The vegan philosopher Morrissey tells us that "meat is murder," and for our vegetarian purposes he's correct. But murder is also murder, which is why you can't shoot your drug dealer even if he brazenly gives you hamburger instead of weed.

Kimberly "Butterbean" Meadows is a great mom, in some ways. After her son was busted for allegedly attempting to deal some Vicodin—a plot that failed when he accidentally texted his plan to cops—she tried to take responsibility for the botched sale. Sadly, her plan backfired.