U2 have postponed their scheduled week-long residency on the Tonight Show while they deal with the unknown person or persons trying to kill Bono, so Jimmy Fallon booked himself and The Roots to stand in for The Biggest Dad Band in the World last night.

Researchers, finally getting on top of the really important questions like "what foods make people horny," have examined hundreds of previous studies and come up with a list of real, scientifically-proven aphrodisiacs. And chocolate is not one!

Sexy scientists say that they have, for real, no playing, discovered a drug that boosts female sexual desire. Everything is better now! But who's that trying throw salt in your female sex drug game? Haterz!

What is it, exactly, that makes people unwisely crave luxury goods? Now we know: it's chocolate truffles. Science has proven it!: