Is Jerry Yang the Barack Obama of Yahoo? Most employees at the flailing Web giant associate their fearless leader with hopelessness, not hope. The person who created these fliers, featuring Yang and cofounder David Filo, is either a wickedly vicious satirist, or a hapless true believer. Can you suggest a better caption in the comments? The best one will become the post's new headline. Yesterday's winner: trisomy21, for "But I need the Mac to find Cyprus on a map!" (Photo by Yodel Anecdotal)

Yahoo's new marketing push tells us to "Start Wearing Purple." A website created for the campaign features a video of various grungy-looking people, including Yahoo CEO Jerry Yang, wearing purple and hollering. We'd show you the video, but it's not very different from a clip a tipster found of Yahoo cofounder David Filo and top exec Ash Patel dancing awkwardly to a Kelly Clarkson cover. The pair flail around like they're in some kind of bizarro-world Apple iPod commercial. That's the problem with Yahoo: It thinks it's an iPod — universally loved and carried around. But it's really a Mac — a fine product nevertheless rejected by many.Click to view Yahoo, triumphant over a host of other wannabe Web portals in the '90s, resurgent in the early part of this decade, has never really gotten used to not being No. 1. Apple, for all its arrogance, recognizes that the Mac is not the best-selling PC brand. Yahoo's marketing department should spend all its time explaining to Internet users why they should use Yahoo instead of its competitors. That's what Apple does with its "Mac vs. PC" ads. Each commercial humorously sticks to its talking points comparing the advantages of Macs over PCs. Apple does this because it remains far behind in the PC market and needs to convince customers to switch from more popular products. That's what Yahoo needs to do in search. But instead of saying why users should, it markets itself the way Apple markets the iPod — as a ubiquitous aspect of a certain way of life. Apple can do this because it already dominates a market full of similar digital music players. A better product helped sell the iPod to the masses. But an advertising campaign which keeps people associating themselves with the brand reinforces Apple's dominance. Yahoo doesn't have that luxury. It still dominates, but in tiny niches. It needs to say why Yahoo News is better than Google News and the New York Times. It needs to say why Yahoo Fantasy Sports games are the most popular on the Web. It needs to say why anyone who owns a digital camera should upload their pictures to Flickr, not Facebook. But instead, Yahoo spends all it's time trying too hard to convince users how wonderfully wacky it is. What's tragic about that is that the brand Yahoo is trying to create isn't particularly attractive. Look, it screams, we're so desperate to be seen as kooky kids, we're willing to hit our top executives in the face with rubber balls! Perhaps the real target of the campaign is Yahoo's own employees. Morale is in the dumpster at its Sunnyvale headquarters. "Bleeding purple," Yahoo's longtime catchphrase for displaying loyalty to the company, has come to refer to the endless exodus of employees. Wearing purple may boost the mood of longtime Yahoos. But it will hurt recruiting for those outside the cult. What adult wants to work at the company which still hasn't figured out what it wants to be when it grows up?

Yahoo's stock may be tanking, employees abandoning ship, Carl Icahn divesting his shareholdings, and the company relying on once-hated rival Google to better profit from the site's traffic, but someone on the Sunnyvale campus has been working hard on a new logo! It's got the same jauntily jagged baseline, but dispatches with serifs for rounded linecaps. And, like much of the company's internal branding, it's finally purple. The story goes that co-founders David Filo and Jerry Yang painted the walls of the company's original office a cheery purple and yellow because it was the cheapest paint at the store. The paintjob also served to distract early employees from the fact that the roof in the office leaked. In other words, CEO Yang has a long history of slapping a cheap coat of paint over severe structural issues in the hopes of boosting morale.

A judge has unsealed documents in a shareholder lawsuit against Yahoo, the Wall Street Journal reports, and the allegations, now posted online, are explosive. Chiefly, that Microsoft offered to buy Yahoo at $40 a share in January 2007. Then-CEO Terry Semel turned Microsoft down, seeking to strike a commercial partnership instead. Slow progress in negotiating that deal made Microsoft executives impatient, leading to its unsolicited bid at $31 a share. While the plaintiffs, two Michigan pension funds, are presenting that history, it actually explains much about Yahoo's resistance to Microsoft's recent advances.

Why didn't Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer follow through on his threat to take his $33 per share offer for Yahoo to its shareholders? Because Microsoft chairman Bill Gates tapped the brakes, reports Kara Swisher. "Numerous sources" say Gates didn't want a Yahoo merger as a way to solve Microsoft's online problems, but figured as CEO of the company, Ballmer should have free rein.

Like the rest of us, Yahoo's negotiators don't understand what Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer means when he says Microsoft wants to acquire just Yahoo's search business. Board members, fearing corporate raider Carl Icahn and his friends, would now prefer a full merger. Microsoft would be down with such a deal, except CEO Ballmer and company worry Yahoo cofounder Yang and Filo still won't accept a bid for less than $37 a share. We don't buy this excuse, if only because we've heard Yang and Filo don't have much say over negotiations anymore. Not after the high-fives.

LiveJournal founder Brad Fitzpatrick is a prankster, as evidenced by his Halloween costume last year, when the new Googler dressed up as Facebook to mock his coworkers' fears of the social network. I'm told that in Once You're Lucky, Twice You're Good, Sarah Lacy's new book about Web 2.0, there's an anecdote about Fitzpatrick submitting an expense report — successfully! — for "hookers and blow" when he worked at blog software startup Six Apart. That was likely a reference to the early days of LiveJournal, when users made ridiculous accusations that Fitzpatrick was spending money meant for servers and bandwidth on "hookers and blow." We'd love to hear more, but alas, Fitzpatrick only got 8 out of 294 pages, according to the book's index. Here's the page for "D" through "F":

Everyone's piling on Jerry Yang, saying Yahoo's founder-CEO needs to go. Why? The weak stock that provoked Microsoft's unsolicited bid may have been the result of his absentee ownership over the years. But Yahoo's deeper problem is the rot in its technical prowess. And that has everything to do with the quieter cofounder, David Filo. Filo has stayed behind the scenes, but wields considerable power over Yahoo's infrastructure. Requests for more hardware go through him, for example. When Yahoo executive Jeff Weiner joked in an internal all-hands movie about not going through IT because it was "too much paperwork," the audience surely laughed because they knew exactly what he meant.

Jerry Yang's spin campaign about why the Microsoft bid fell through is transparent. He's not trying to cajole Steve Ballmer back to the negotiating table; he's trying to cover his rear and appease indignant shareholders. The only reason he's so open about accepting a new bid from Microsoft, I think, is that he's not expecting another one to come. Ballmer has more or less said he thinks that Yahoo is worth less and less every day; last Saturday, when Yang flew up with cofounder David Filo to meet with Ballmer one last time, was as close as the two will ever get to agreeing on Yahoo's worth. The thing is, unless Yang makes some dramatic shifts, Ballmer may well be right.

Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer heeded our advice and walked away from a bid for Yahoo. Did he dodge a potentially career-ending bullet? "The talks broke down this afternoon after a face to face meeting in the Seattle area that included Microsoft CEO Steve ballmer, Microsoft exec. kevin johnson, and Yahoo co-founders Jerry Yang and David Filo." [All Things Digital] (Photo by Yodel Anecdotal)

Yahoos David Filo, Jerry Yang, Sue Decker and Blake Jorgensen watching All Hands, the Movie last week. Suggest your caption in the comments; the best will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: WagCurious, for "Don't smell evil." (Photo byYodel Anecdotal)

Yes, the leaked copy of Yahoo's All Hands, the Movie we received this afternoon features a scene where Trent Herren of international operations discovers client strategist Ian Kennish is a Valleywag leaker. But leave it to the folks in Sunnyvale to think we have some special, complicated web site for leaks — when really, all you have to do is send us an email. Full video, including infrastructure EVP Ash Patel cleaning the cube of incredibly messy co-founder David Filo, after the jump.

Let Google and Facebook play ultimate frisbee. Yahoos like balls, and they like them in the face. Their game is called Faceball. How it works: Two players sit in chairs ten feet apart and take turns throwing inflated beach balls at each other's faces. One point per facial, and no ducking. This goes on for five rounds. John Allspaw and Dunstan Orchard developed Faceball in April 2007 and ever since, Yahoos — from CEO Jerry Yang on down — have loved it. When it came time to plan the launch of Flickr Video, there was little debate as to what to do. A Faceball tournament was held on April 9, 2008. In the picture above is your winner, cofounder David Filo. Below, a video (on Vimeo, not Flickr, oddly) from Faceball creators Allspaw and Orchard describing their game, as well as more photos (on Flickr) from the tournament.

Missed earnings, recession fears, and dodgy deals are eviscerating the stock portfolios of tech titans like Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Steve Ballmer, Larry Page, Sergey Brin, and Eric Schmidt. Here's the damage.

Yahoo founders David Filo and Jerry Yang own 80,833,066 and 54,110,564 shares of Yahoo, respectively. At Microsoft's offer price, the pair have made almost $1.6 billion since yesterday's close and stand to cash out more than $4 billion total if the deal goes through. More amazing? Ousted CEO Terry Semel stands to cash out more than $650 million — not a bad reward for reviving Yahoo and then running it into the ground. We doubt the scurrilous, unfounded rumors that Semel is a Scientology OT 6, but it would explain a lot. Here's our chart of the top Yahoo shareholders and how much their Yahoo's holdings are worth at Microsoft's price.

This morning, Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer made the usual polite noises about "integrating" Yahoo's management into Microsoft. The reality? Come on. They're all fired, except for the geeks. If Microsoft had any respect for current management, they would have negotiated a friendly deal instead of launching a takeover. Most of the executive suite will be gone, I bet, within six months if the takeover succeeds. Here are the details on who's in and who's out, starting at the top.

Pictured this morning on the TechCrunch40 stage, four men worth a total of a kajillion dollars or something along those lines. From left, Yahoo founder David Filo, wearing the safe and unimaginative Silicon Valley uniform, YouTube cofounder Chad Hurley in his jeans-and-jacket casual yuppie attire, Ning and Netscape cofounder Marc Andreessen, who goes for the novel tracksuit and khakis combo, and Sequoia Capital uber-investor Michael Moritz. Oh, Michael. He's Welsh, so he's always dressed a bit more snappily than the normal tech layperson, which is a good thing. But what on earth is he doing with his shoes? Hoping to change into slippers and a cardigan like a powerful Mr. Rogers? Or just nervously squirming in his chair before the crowd? VCs already have a reputation as ADD-addled fidgeters, this isn't going to help. (Photo by jspepper)

Victory is sweet. Redoing the org chart so suit your whims? Even sweeter. While Yahoo president Sue Decker may not have the CEO title yet, thanks to a sweeping reorganization, she has practically all the power. Kara Swisher at AllThingsD got a copy of Decker's memo to the staff. As we reported earlier, Hilary Schneider is running all of sales — in fact, anything that even vaguely looks like sales — and ad-sales chief Gregory Coleman is out. What's more fun, though, than that confirmation, is trying to figure out what functions don't report to Decker now. As best we can tell, the outliers, left to cofounders Jerry Yang and David Filo, include legal, HR, finance, and tech. The full memo, after the jump.

NICK DOUGLAS — Dear startup founders, this is what to look forward to: promoting environmentalism by dressing up "camo sumo" and smooshing yourself against your co-founder. I'd say "the loser is their dignity," but good on them for making Yahoo feel great about caring about the Earth for a week. At least Yahoo founders Jerry Yang and David Filo, unlike their CEO Terry Semel, didn't have to arm-wrestle Tom Cruise. Pick a favorite to win, then check out the full photo set.