Fidel Castro death rumors are like the Nigerian e-mail scam of the news cycle — they've been around forever and are never going away. So here we are: according to the Miami Herald, is Castro "very close to a neurovegetative state" — not quite dead, but close:
Restrictions that have kept Cuban islanders landlocked for half a century have been mostly lifted according to a foreign ministry statement in the Central Committee's official newspaper, Granma.
I met Liván, Takeshi and the rest of their band of frikis—rock and metal fans of the punk-and-anarchist subcategory—around nine one Thursday night on the median of Havana's G Street. I'd come to Havana to write a book about what it was like to be a young adult in the post-Fidel city and, since G Street was the biggest party in town, it was where I began.
Before he became president, Barack Obama promised he was going to close the Guantanamo Bay detention center before his first term was out. "I have said repeatedly that I intend to close Guantanamo, and I will follow through on that," Obama told ABC News in November 2008, shortly after winning the election. Almost four years later, Guantanamo remains open, and now another one of its prisoners has died.
Two women in Miami face zero charges after transporting two fetuses into the U.S. from Cuba in their suitcases on January 30th. So I guess it's a cool new thing to do?
Our old pal to the South, retired Cuban dictator Fidel Castro, has been watching these Republican debates, including the most recent one in which the candidates talked about Fidel Castro going to Hell. He has not been impressed, writing in an editorial that "the selection of a Republican candidate for the presidency of this globalized and expansive empire is - and I mean this seriously - the greatest competition of idiocy and ignorance that has ever been." But what if Mitch Daniels jumps in?
Are we sick of Herman Cain saying stupid things? No? Good: here's video of the Republican front-runner asking a bunch of people in Miami "How do you say 'delicious' in Cuban?" This is, we guess, Cain's third embarrassing gaffe in as many days, if you don't count his entire campaign as slow-motion, multi-day gaffe. And, no, "he was tired" won't fly as an excuse—he's asking because he's enjoying a cup of Cuban coffee.
Where does Michele Bachmann stand on normalizing trade relations with Cuba? Well. It's not particularly high on her priority list, let's say! Not merely because they're dirty commies. But also, apparently, because Cuba is working with Hezbollah to potentially set up missile sites on the island. Perhaps you might even call it a... Cuban Missile Crisis? Or is this something of an exaggeration?
No one has seen Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez for two weeks! (Well, not no one, but you know.) He flew to Cuba on June 10 for surgery on a pelvic abscess, speaking to media two days later to say he was fine, but he apparently hasn't returned to Venezuela since. According to the not-exactly-trustworthy government, Chavez is recovering well, but rumors abound that he is suffering from prostate cancer and may still be in "critical condition" in the hospital. (His daughter and mother were reportedly flown to Cuba, "urgently.") It's kind of unclear what would happen in the event of his death or incapacitation, given that Chavez is more or less an autocrat, not to mention a big jerk. "The US," The Daily Telegraph writes, "would hope to see a less hostile and more market-friendly candidate for the presidency emerge," which is a polite way of saying the CIA is going to be all up in that shit. [Telegraph]
Among the cache of documents allegedly leaked to Wikileaks by PFC Bradley Manning was over 700 dossiers on detainees at Guantanamo Bay Prison. A slew of international papers published stories based on them today, and Wikileaks is dribbling out the full cache. They paint a picture of Gitmo as a poop-strewn debacle stuffed with crazy people, a journalist, random Afghan civilians—even some dangerous terrorists.
It seems that "former" Cuban leader Fidel Castro pulled a funny on everyone! After having surgery in 2006 to stop intestinal bleeding, Fidel issued a statement saying his brother Raul would temporarily be taking charge of Cuba. But in a new column the old timer states that the people of Cuba "affectionately" called him the leader of the Communist Party even though he really wasn't (sort of) and didn't want to be (kind of). According to Fidel:
[Extras from a Cuban zombie film, "Juan de los Muertos," or "Juan of the Dead," take a lunch break while filming on Havana's Malecón today. Image via AP]
