Bogusky, aren't you in Miami, you overgrown yuppie skate rat bastard? They shoot at people for making videos like this in Miami. At least give the kids a chance.

Go to any function where advertising "creatives" gather, and you will see that guy: the one wearing some old Converse, or crazy purple-yellow-red-green Adidas he designed himself, online. The average old person would not think such a cool guy could be such a corporate hack, but they would be wrong! We're not here to give you list of facts about Alex Bogusky's career (he's the chairman of Crispin Porter + Bogusky, the supercool ad agency that brought you the weird Burger King ads, Microsoft's current ad campaign, and many others—basically the EDGY agency that's not too edgy for corporate behemoths)—we're just here to demonstrate to you that, yes, Alex Bogusky is that ad guy. Okay:

Sometimes a worthless "consumer" will see some very strategic high-concept ad that involves, say, a subservient chicken, and innocently ask, "How does that sell burgers?" And then the creative ad execs will chuckle at this un-strategic dunce, their target audience.

Here we have, you know, big ass butts, pimping food to children. Which is totally wrong, which is, of course, the whole point, because SO COOL ad agency Crispin Porter Bogusky, the inventors of all the weird Burger King ad shit, did this ad, and they just love doing things that people will say is too weird and also wrong, because it generates "Buzz," just like Midtown Manhattan. The point is Sir Mix-a-Lot is teaching obesity and sexuality to your kids and you're really okay with that, deep down, because you love Whoppers.

Microsoft and agency Crispin Porter + Bogusky's post-Seinfeld ads are out and we've embedded them below. They start with a guy who looks just like the actor who plays PC in Apple's Mac vs. PC ads saying "I'm a PC and I've been made into a stereotype." Then the commercials cut to shark-hunting adventurers, African teachers, graffiti artists, minor celebrtities and astronauts all also saying "I'm a PC." Then a voice-over begins: "Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently." Well, not actually. But Microsoft made billions copying Apple's operating system and its clearly decided to make more copying Apple's "Think Different" ad campaign — so why not just be out with it?Microsoft's new "I'm a PC" ad.

The doublespeak coming from Microsoft and its ad agency, Crispin Porter & Bogusky, in the wake of its "icebreaker" ad campaign featuring Bill Gates and Jerry Seinfeld, is amazing. Yesterday, Valleywag learned that Microsoft PR was revving up a spin campaign to go along with the ad campaign. Its aim: To make sure no one interpreted its shift to a series of anti-Mac ads as an abandonment of the Seinfeld spots. But Crispin Porter tells Gizmodo that it did, indeed, have another Seinfeld and Gates spot already produced. It's just not scheduled to air. Anytime. As of yet. It could air. Some day. If Microsoft wants it too. So does this mean Seinfeld will return? As a Microsoft flack told us yesterday, "possibly" and "potentially."

It's time for the second spot in the Crispin Porter & Bogusky-produced advertising campaign for Microsoft and Windows Vista. Unlike the last one, there's even a computer! Premiering in two parts during tonight's episode of Big Brother on CBS, the premise posits mundane comedian Jerry Seinfeld and Microsoft cofounder Bill Gates staying in a Seattle home with "real people" (like veteran actor David Costabile) in order to connect with consumers. Cue the hijinx. The question is, will the campaign work?I may well be too far down the rabbit hole to have any idea if the spots are having the desired warm-and-fuzzy effect on the populace. If anything, they serve to remind us of the opposite: That Gates and Microsoft are so out of touch, the company has to pay an advertising agency $300 million (and Seinfeld $10 million) to lend even the thinnest veneer of approachability. "Cool," presumably, would have cost extra.

Microsoft is pulling out all the stops to buff the image of its startingly unpopular operating system, Windows Vista. Nothing so far has worked. Don't worry, Apple and Linux fans — Microsoft is not doing anything threatening, such as actually improving the software.Instead, the company is paying aging comedian and (reformed?) Mac enthusiast Jerry Seinfeld $10 million to be the product's spokesmonkey. At least one of the ads looks like it was shot against a Brooklyn backdrop by Michel Gondry, the french auteur beloved by white people. Who's responsible for this sudden rush to be hip? This sounds like the work of Alex Bogusky, the studvertiser at Mac-worshipping ad firm Crispin Porter & Bogusky. Guess Gondry won't be touring Apple stores to promote his next film. (Photo by AP/Franka Bruns)

Before it landed Microsoft's $300 million account and hired Jerry Seinfeld as a spokesperson, the admen of agency Crispin Porter & Bogusky met with Fast Company's Danielle Sacks in April 2007. That's when Alex Bogusky explained exactly what kind of computers it uses, and why:

You know Microsoft is hopelessly out of touch when the opening paragraph of the Wall Street Journal article that's supposed to be touting the tech giant's marketing coup starts off something like this: "Microsoft Corp., weary of being cast as a stodgy oldster by Apple Inc.'s advertising, is turning for help to Jerry Seinfeld." Huh? Microsoft is hoping to appeal to the Gen Y demo—people in their 20s—by hiring a spokesman who is 54? Better yet: Seinfeld will be appearing in the commercials alongside Bill Gates himself, who doesn't exactly conjure up an image of cool with iPod-listening, Macbook-carrying hipsters on the L train. The $300 million campaign, which will debut on Sept. 4th, will be promoting Microsoft's Vista operating system, which, company officials acknowledge, has generated a "negative public perception." (That's probably because it sucks.) Why did Seinfeld decide to participate? We're guessing it may have had something to do with the $10 million paycheck.

Rising ad star Alex Bogusky of Crispin Porter + Bogusky is the subject of the cover feature in the latest issue of Fast Company. The story focuses on Microsoft's $300 million deal with the agency to, in Fast Company's words, "crush Apple." Bogusky will be fighting an uphill battle on two fronts — one against Microsoft's perpetually clueless marketing drones, and the other against the fact that Apple's products are, you know, better. Microsoft has even had trouble convincing the public largely trapped in the Windows operating system monopoly to buy Vista, and the company's branding is a complete mess. But hey, check out Bogusky's wavy locks, chiseled features, stylish boots and designer jeans!

In response to the rumor that Jackass star Johnny Knoxville is the new Microsoft pitchman, a company spokesperson emails: "Microsoft is planning a consumer advertising campaign with Crispin Porter & Bogusky. We have no other details to share at this time."

Forget Justin Long as Mac and John Hodgman as PC. The latest computer pitchman could be Johnny Knoxville, star of MTV's Jackass series. A reader of the blog Cajun Boy in the City claims to have been in a focus group for an unnamed company he believes is Microsoft. Redmond's marketing execs recently hired ad firm Crispin Porter & Bogusky, the creators of Miller Lite's "Man Laws" campaign and Burger King's live-action "King." The reader writes: