This is University of Tennessee student David Kernell, the Democratic state senator's son who reportedly accessed Sarah Palin's email account by guessing the answers to her "security questions." This is what qualifies as hacking in 2008, and the family lawyer is saying "this is a difficult time" instead of denying anything, so Kernell will go to prison forever as soon as the Grand Jury indicts him, which has not yet happened. Ha ha, Democratic politicians have immoral families, unlike small-town Republicans like vice presidential nominee Palin. (Photo via Wired)

How much does awful celebrity gossip machine TMZ pay to get its hands on all those exclusives? A whole helluva lot more than a reasonable person might think. For example: OJ Simpson is on trial in Vegas right now for armed robbery of some sports collectibles. Clearly, OJ's time in the spotlight has passed. He's third rate. But here's how much a tape of the crime was worth:

So the vile HACKER who HACKED poor Sarah Palin and her precious emails? Some kid from Tennessee. His dad is a Democratic state representative, which means of course that he was paid by Barack Obama personally to HACK the shit out of that poor woman. The kid (the ALLEGED HACKER) is obviously a brilliant computer genius. Didn't you hear how he hacked all that hacking he hacked? He went to the "I forgot my password" screen and correctly guessed the answers to the "security questions." HACK HACK HACK. Now the FBI is going to throw him in jail for a zillion years, even though they should be arresting Yahoo, it seems like. The dumb kid brought it on himself by revealing the proxy server he used to hack hack hack, and his Anonymous buddies at 4Chan (NSFW) are either disavowing that he was truly anonymous or saying he's a SMOKESCREEN, or something. Internet, lol. [CNET]

If you cashed in during the boom times by taking shortcuts—or you made a fortune during the credit crisis by spreading misinformation—and you're wondering what your life will be like in a few years after the government investigation is complete and you're facing an indictment as long as your arm, you'd be well advised to take a look at the article in the Times today about Alberto Vilar, the disgraced financier who once presided over Amerindo Investment Advisors. Once worth $1 billion and one of the largest donors to the Metropolitan Opera (the Met later ripped out the plaque with Vilar's name on it after he was indicted), Vilar hasn't found much peace in the three years since he was first accused of fraud.

If you're looking for a bargain in Greenwich, here's your chance. Next week the IRS will be auctioning off disgraced hedge funder Michael Lauer's mansion at 7 Dwight Lane, with the bidding starting at just $2.5 million. Lauer, who founded Lancer Management, which once had $1 billion in assets, was indicted earlier this year for allegedly bilking investors out of more than $200 million between 1999 and 2003. Now the IRS will hand over the keys to Lauer's former home at a public auction next Friday. But if you're thinking about bidding, you might want to make sure you have a good contractor (or demolition crew) on speed dial. Here's why:

A Sacramento-based "high-tech pimp" who advertised sex with underage women for pay on Craigslist is now in custody. Federal investigators were able to bust 22-year old Stephen McKesson after one of the young women's friends saw her photo in Craigslist's Erotic Services section for panderers. Nobody will see the benefit to the community in this: In terms of ensuring the health and safety of teenage prostitutes, or in terms of good publicity for Craigslist. CEO Jim Buckmaster and founder Craig Newmark get all the blame for offering a space for sex trade ads, but none of the credit for the accidental public service such space offers. As if there were no unwilling minors in prostitution before abusive but charismatic hustlers got laptops?It's unlikely that Buckmaster and Newmark would ever embrace the role of sex trade stewardship in the public square. Because they don't need to in order to remain successful. But to walk the laissez-faire line towards sex work they do can only take their image as "The Good Guys" (or at least, "The Not Quite So Greedy Guys") so far. There's no denying that Erotic Services never was just an innocent home for legal, consensual fantasy-for-hire. So Craigslist collaborates with law enforcement to police the site's own users. But Craigslist users are not some special breed of "pervert" or "paedophile" preying on children — the traceability of online behavior just makes it easier to see what already took place behind closed doors. After all, McKesson also used old-timey calling cards with salacious photographs to market his services in a throwback to Storyville's heyday. This is the "saddest part" of these stories, not the laptops and the blurred-face photos the media and law enforcement trot out fetishistically. The next time Craigslist or any online service is called to task to explain what they are doing to end the exploitation of minors, they should start by explaining its ancient history, not new surveillance technology.

Julie Lankamp, a former producer for CNN, was found dead in her Manhattan apartment last night. Her two-year-old daughter was also found in the home, crying over her mom's body. The Post says Lankamp likely died of a cocaine overdose; the Daily News says foul play hasn't been ruled out. Lankamp left CNN ten years ago, and most recently founded Media Melons, a media production company. She also advertised her "sexy and alluring deep voice" for voiceover work.

Actor Ryan O'Neal and his son Redmond were both arrested for drug possession this morning, the LA Times reports. A vial of meth was found in the Love Story star's bedroom, while the drug was found on his 24-year-old son's (his mother his actress Farrah Fawcett) person. The family that gets arrested for drugs together... Sadly this isn't the first drug-related arrest for the family this year. Ryan's daughter Tatum, with whom he costarred in the Depression-era con artist film Paper Moon, was nabbed back in June while trying to buy crack cocaine on a New York City street. Sigh. And Redmond has a history of heroin problems and Ryan was arrested last year after he accidentally fired a gun while fighting with another son:

Accel Europe, the London-based arm of venture-capital firm Accel Partners, is attempting to raise hundreds of millions of dollars for a new fund. The effort will likely succeed, given Accel's brand name; its investment in Facebook has given Accel new cachet. One thing I'd love to know how the partners explain to potential investors: Why they have a convicted criminal in their midst.The firm's partners continue to back Kaj-Erik Relander, the former CEO of Sonera, who left the Finnish telecom firm abruptly in 2001 to join Accel. His downfall is Europe's own version of the HP pretexting scandal: He was charged with illegally using Sonera's network to monitor employees' and reporters' phone calls, in an effort to find leaks. Relander was convicted and given a suspended sentence. The last time Accel Europe raised money in 2005, the case was under appeal — a reasonable defense for Accel's support of Relander. But a court denied his appeal last year. What's Accel's excuse now? A commenter on TheFunded.com suggests Relander's questionable ethics are reflective of Accel's entire European branch, accusing the firm of backing shady startups. Whether such charges are true or not, they show why Accel's bullheaded defense of Relander is risky for the firm's reputation. Relander committed a crime. He was convicted of it. And now, Accel wants to give him more money to handle.

Newsday reporter Rocco Parascandola either drew the short straw at the assignment desk yesterday, or he sincerely believes that a five-year-old's opinion on the graffiti menace is worth 700 words. A mouthy little law-and-order kindergartener on Long Island got so worked up by an earlier Newsday story on taggers that he had his grandpa transcribe his tiny thoughts on the issue into a letter, which warranted another Newsday story, in which everybody comes off as monumentally stupid. Particularly Newsday:

Terry Childs, the IT guy gone wild who worked for the City and County of San Francisco and effectively froze municipal systems when he went rogue, infamously stashed all sorts of backdoors around the network. Now engineers brought in to solve the mess still can't find one router, which when accessed over the network replies: "This system is the personal property of Terry S. Childs." How much will this cry for job security cost taxpayers? $197,000 has already been spent out of $1 million estimated for the repairs. Childs remains behind bars on $5 million bail and faces a maximum sentence of seven years. [Network World] (Photo by Morten Skogly)

Another trio of small-time crooks have been charged with extortion for threatening to expose a California client of an online prostitute. These Fresno-based operators, working with an escort who used Craigslist to meet her client, demanded cash in exchange for keeping his prostitution habit a secret. Is this a copycat crime, inspired by the three scammers who told a Bay Area tech executive they'd leak a sex tape of him with a prostitute unless he paid them off? If the accused Silicon Valley extortionists were reminiscent of The Big Sleep, with their requested $250,000 bribe, the Central Valley guys are more The Big Lebowksi. They said they'd keep mum for a mere $3,000, to be left "in a shopping cart in a parking lot" of a local mall.

My oh my, look what has "surfaced," as they say: A photo of populist war hero presidential candidate John McCain lumbering his way onto Raffaello Follieri's yacht in Montenegro! And on the day after Follieri pleads guilty to multimillion-dollar fraud! How highly enjoyable. It was already known that McCain spent his 70th birthday, in 2006, aboard the yacht with Follieri and glamorous actress Anne Hathaway. But this is the first photo of the meeting, which drives home the unmissable point: John McCain spends his birthday on foreign yachts with criminals and Hollywood types. There's not enough lipstick in the world to cover this pig. Big version of the photo (found by The Nation)—and the upshot of the meeting—after the jump:

Crazy old Kanye West, the retiringly modest Best Rapper In the World Ever, has been arrested at LAX. It seems the college dropout said hoof! to some paparazzo's camera, smashing it to the floor like so many California dreams. Other than this being a curious example of an attention hog dissing attention, this isn't exactly shocking, given West's history of getting mad at people. Well, at least he didn't break a damn MacBook Air over some damn hippie's head.

Photos of John McCain on a yacht with imprisoned con man Raffaello Follieri have surfaced. The pics, which were obtained by the Nation, were taken in 2006 when McCain met up with the Italian playboy aboard a yacht in Montenegro. The delicious irony: At the time, Follieri, who pleaded guilty yesterday to conspiracy to commit wire fraud, eight counts of wire fraud and five counts of money laundering, was living high on the hog thanks to billionaire Ron Burkle. So one of the Democratic party's most generous and reliable donors was the one who actually paid for McCain's "evening floating on the Adriatic with one of Hollywood's top actresses and her smooth-talking Italian beau." [The Nation]

Kanye West was arrested this morning at the American Airlines terminal at LAX for felony vandalism after he smashed a photographer's camera and got into a scuffle with the paparazzi, including a videographer from TMZ, naturally. Maybe he should have borrowed Diddy's private jet instead? [NYDN, TMZ]

International playboy and fraud superstar Raffaello Follieri is no longer just an alleged swindler. As was rumored earlier this week, he pleaded guilty yesterday to 14 counts of fraud, conspiracy, and money laundering in connection with a Catholic church property investment scam. He had to give up $2.4 million, along with all that nice jewelry he gave to his charmed girlfriend Anne Hathaway. Next time give a poor man a shot, Anne! Now Follieri's personal grooming is paying the price for his foolish decision not to listen to Lizzie Grubman:

The Smoking Gun got hold of the FBI's list of jewelry that pixieish actress Anne Hathaway (referred to only as a "girlfriend" or "individual") had to surrender because her ex-boyfriend, holy swindler Raffaello Follieri, bought it for her with his fraudulent proceeds. He was very generous with other people's money! There are a dozen items on the list, which must be worth tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars. Money is no object when investors are paying unknowingly! The full list, Rolexes and all:

The Smoking Gun has a list of items that Anne Hathaway had to turn over to the FBI since the dapper young gentleman who gave the items to her—Raffaello Follieri—will now officially be spending the foreseeable future in prison. For those of you updating their calendars at home, Raffi will will back in court on October 3rd for sentencing. [TSG, AP]

It's really quite impressive that Naomi Campbell even has time to squeeze in her primary occupations of getting hairweaves, throwing monumental tantrums, and hanging out on yachts in between stints of court-mandated community service. Last year's sterling contribution to the New York Sanitation Department is currently being followed up with work in a London soup kitchen. (Sadly, her community service back home forced her to miss the finals of US Open, where she appeared last Sunday, left.) Naomi is not actually required to come into contact with any homeless people—let's face it, they've been through enough—but is "doing paperwork in the back office." Still, her supervisors might want to keep, say, paperweights and large staplers out of reach.