Marc Dreier, the prostitute-loving disgraced lawyer accused of bilking investors out of hundreds of millions dollars, will plead guilty on May 11 to money laundering, according to his lawyer, Gerald Shargel. The saddest thing for Dreier? Once he does so, he'll have to say goodbye to this place. Can we interest you in a spectacular apartment in One Beacon Court, by any chance? [WSJ]
If Michelle Obama could be forgiven for feeling a little competitive toward France's first lady Carla Bruni-Sarkozy, especially when it comes to matters of fashion and all-round feminine allure, we think it's safe to say that this morning, Michelle will be feeling glad that her vanity, as far as we know, stops short of making sex tapes. Yes, a burglar has stolen a cache of "highly intimate" videos and photographs featuring Carla with her ex-boyfriend/baby daddy Raphaël Enthoven (who, for those who like to keep track of European affairs, she stole from his then-wife, novelist Justine Levy, whose father, philosopher Bernard-Henri Levy, is reportedly winning the heart of wealthy fashion plate Daphne Guinness away from Andre Balazs). Police in Paris are hoping to catch the thief before any images hit the web; the web, obviously, hopes the opposite.
The good news is that gun homicides were down in New York City last year, according to the NYPD. The bad news is that knife deaths were up. So either the city's criminals no longer have firearms because they've been trading them in for $200 Chase gift cards, or our miscreants can no longer afford to buy post-industrial age weapons. Either way, it's kinda unsettling! [NYP]
Accused murderer and savvy webhead Philip Markoff tried to hang himself in his cell with shoelaces, so authorities now have him wearing an insane-looking anti-suicide smock called a Ferguson, according to the Daily News.
Former dating columnist Julia Allison, an Internet microcelebrity now famous for not being particularly famous, has finally gone too far in her attempt to acquire Facebook fans. She may even have broken the law.
The Way We Live Now: Fleeing the police, on foot. Who can afford cars? Let them all go bankrupt. All we need for our ATM robberies are a crowbar and a laid-off blesbok, for distraction.
There's fresh evidence that members of the social set have turned to petty crime as they cope with the downturn. There are no missing handbags this time around, but there are several vases full of flowers that could be eventually entered into evidence. Vanity Fair reports that several people made off with the orange tulip centerpieces at the Robert F. Kennedy Jr.-hosted Fisherman's Ball the other night. Alas, VF is not naming names. But presumably we'll find out who was responsible for these despicable acts just as soon as Andrew Cuomo starts issuing subpoenas. [VF]
These are busy times for bankruptcy attorneys (they're also quite profitable times too), and stress levels are on the rise, according to psychologists. Presumably that will be Madlyn Primoff's defense when she answers to charges she abandoned her kids on the side of the road after she couldn't get them to stop fighting in the backseat. Primoff, who lives in Scarsdale and is a partner at Kaye Scholer, ditched her 10- and 12-year-old daughters in downtown White Plains on Sunday.
A gentle word of advice: If you happen to lose your job, whatever you do don't throw a big tantrum, or you might wind up being placed under round-the-clock surveillance to make sure you don't go on a murderous rampage. That's what happened to an employee of one financial services firm who got "upset" when he was fired, even though he presumably didn't have a history of settling scores with a 9-millimeter Glock.
