The respectable, politically powerful golden child of the religious right says sexiness on college campuses comes from condom handouts and ends with totalitarian government.

Oh sure, Jake Gyllenhaal's PR lady admits doing this terrifying "Intensati" fitness cult workout during work hours, and meanwhile fat West Virginians are reducing Jamie Oliver to tears, by fatness. Why does Jake Gylenhaal continue to neglect obese West Virginians?