Cool Pope is at it again. This Sunday, he's going to marry 20 couples who are already cohabiting. Some of the couples even have kids! Their poor Catholic grandmothers are going to feel so much better now. (Cohabitation is a sin in the Catholic Church).

When we hear about unmarried young couples living together in sin, we're like "Sure, kids these days are living in sin, rejecting god, and fornicating nightly in Lucifer's glory, what else is new?" But now we hear that older couples are also living together in sin. Aren't you older couples old enough to know the teachings of Jesus, about not living in sin?

Unmarried couples are increasingly living together, even though it doesn't improve your chance of a successful marriage. Births are up—but infertility gives guys cancer. What does this all mean? We're all going to die alone.

Not everything in the bold sociological experiment known as Wife Swap always goes smoothly: Take for example last night's arranged-marriage lab rats, Patrick (according to his name tag) and temporary spouse, uh, Sasquatch—she of the man-hands and unrealistic household-cleanliness goals. Frankly, we don't know who Sasquatch thinks she is, waltzing into Patrick's perfectly lovely, catshit-laden home and demeanoring him by insisting he dispose of the feline feces.