Luckily for you, the wife of the "CEO of one of the biggest TARP recipients" has unwisely chosen to write an anonymous diatribe about the hardships of life as a "TARP wife." Class rage ahead:

Heather Eisenlord's law firm is paying her $80,000 to take the year off, travel around the world doing whatever, and wait for the economy to rebound. Fine, but who will save the chicken farmers?

Another Bossnapping case in France. Stop being so trendy!

Kate Ahlborn—Harvard '07, Upper East Sider, Vanity Fair writer—ventured into Brooklyn, where dirty people live, for a weird Brooklyny art show, and wrote about it. May she never fucking return.

Angry Londoners are having pitched fruit-throwing battles with bankers in the street. The French are making billionaires call riot police to escort their taxis. And us? We're too busy abandoning our pleasure craft.

All the world government big shots are meeting in London tomorrow for the G20. Really, they're much more worried about the hardtothemuthafuckincore protesters than the economy thing. Are UK protesters putting American protesters to shame?

Executives in AIG's London office called England's Serious Organized Crime Agency to report that they are being extorted out of their bonus money by New York's Attorney General.

Some people's entire lives were created just to help the tabloids stoke class warfare. There's no other explanation for Swedish countess Marie Douglas-David, who needs $53K per week just to survive. She can prove it!

They thought they were safe in their Connecticut palaces, but oh no: top AIG execs face death threats, angry neighbors in their driveways and tabloid photographers. Then there's the roving band of irate poors.

All Americans are currently home sharpening their hatchets, consumed by burning class rage, thinking of how they can't wait to gut those AIG bonus bastards like a fish. And now we know some names!

CNBC is on fire! Just like the economy. After being lambasted for being catastrophically wrong about everything its anchors and reporters are paid to understand, the business network is actually enjoying its notoriety.

Last year, class resentment in NYC consisted of the poors complaining about the excesses of the rich, while the rich paid no attention. But now the rich are forced to pretend to change. Slight progress!

Who were the hugely tacky snobs at the International Debutantes Ball in New York last night? Many were from Texas. One is Arianna Huffington's daughter!

Where is the government's bank-bailout money going? In part to pay for Wall Street banker Peter Kraus's $37 million Park Avenue spread.

Oh no, the Obamas are inspiring class warfare in DC! Elite private school attendees are mocking other elite private school attendees, and it's all because of little Malia and Sasha!

Running enthusiasts are weird, especially those training-for-the-marathon types. Even weirder: what one well-off SoHo man received as a birthday gift: As the NYT tells us: a Kenyan runner.

We're back from vacation and need to learn to hate again, so let's check in with famous New York Times conservative columnist David Brooks, shall we? Today, the last conservative intellectual in America is writing about this new recession we're in, and how it will make so many people sad, and mad. There is no money! Where is the money? This thing called "the market" was supposed to make the money get bigger and bigger every year forever until Jesus came back, but instead it just ate all the money, but David Brooks doesn't really want to talk about that. He wants to talk about The Middle Class! There isn't one, anymore.

The line on Sarah Palin's $150,000 shopping spree is that it, uh, hurts her blue collar cred. It's not very "Joe the Plumber" to spend more than three times the median American household income on a month's worth of clothes from elitist high-end stores. The woman's Real American authenticity has been her best asset, but that huge number, those receipts, the stores, all of those shocked everyone. Because she still looks exactly the same! Which is why this story isn't as simple as it's been painted. She's not beer heiress Cindy McCain pretending to be a woman of the people (which Cindy has obviously never done)—Palin was handed a blank check to go shopping, and she shopped exactly like a typical upper-middle class suburban mom would've shopped. And all the criticisms of her shopping are actually elitist! Seriously! Always hilarious Washington Post fashion critic Robin Givhan wrote all about Sarah Palin's "exceptionally ordinary" style just last month.

Hey, here's what we're sick of: middle classness! While some of your elite coastal media obsess over some made-up standard of "authenticity" (Sarah Palin's got it! That's all you need to know!), the new hot trend is "caring about the middle class." This is something Democrats are good at! They used to be good at appealing to the "working class" but now no one is sure how to define "working class," at all really. But we all know how to define the middle-class! It's everyone in America! Because everyone in America self-identifies as middle class, and America is so determined not to become Great Britain that we allow everyone to just make up whatever class they want for themselves (which is why rich people are middle class and young white college-educated Brooklynites are working class and Barack Obama is an elitist). Just this week, in a mostly decent column (surprisingly!), globalist Thomas Friedman lambasted John McCain and Sarah Palin for refusing to agree that paying taxes is patriotic. You see he should know what patiotism is, he is the middle class personified!

Home-schooling? So over. Try city-schooling your kids at the Met and trendy bars. That's what The Professors' Wives' Club author Joanne Rendell is doing. How does an un-schooled Manhattan five-year-old spend his days? It has its advantages: "Un-kindergarten for us means Benny can sleep late so I can write. It means we don't have to worry about bedtimes and can go out on the town with friends any night of the week. We can go to Europe and visit my family when the flights are cheap..."Heh. It's like she's trying to provoke criticism from the blogs.