We learned yesterday that Duncan Brannan, the longtime voice of Chuck E. Cheese, the anthropomorphic character designed to indoctrinate children into belief in fiat money, has been fired from his position. Who will replace him? "The lead singer for the pop-punk bank Bowling for Soup." And Chuck himself?

Duncan Brannan, the voice behind Chuck E. Cheese's star character since 1993 and longtime (specifically: "forever") "Child of God through Christ Jesus" has been dropped from the company, The Dallas Observer reports.

First it was Chuck E. Cheese, and now it's Tweety Bird. A Dallas mother is furious with the Six Flags Fiesta Texas amusement park after noticing that in a photo taken with her daughters, Tweety Bird appears to be giving the middle finger.

Citizens of Las Cruces, NM and protectors of decency everywhere are outraged after a photo surfaced in which Chuck E. Cheese, known mouse pizza mascot, appeared to be giving "The Finger" while posing for a photo with a 4-year-old boy.

What could they be fighting about? Did someone steal another's tickets? Did one of them jump ahead of the other while waiting in line for skee ball? Who knows, but they are angry.

In your substitute Friday media column: Christiane Amanpour eyes George Stephanopoulos' old chair, the Los Angeles Times wraps itself in Johnny Depp's handsome mug, the New York Times does teevee, and a Star is unborn.

In the future, customers will go to a clean, well-lit cafeteria where delicious food will be on display behind glass. See what you like? Drop a few coins in the slot and that liverwurst on rye is all yours. Of course, by "the future" we mean 80 years ago, not in a couple of months when Atari founder Nolan Bushnell brings another of his uWink outposts to the Valley. The gimmick? You order your food on a touch screen! You'd think with Bushnell's experience with animatronics at Chuck E. Cheese, there'd at least be frickin' robots. (Photo by Eater LA)