Say what you will about Britney Spears, but she's a pro. Upon inspecting the photos from her recent, impromptu upskirt shoot, in which her genitals were amateurishly obscured by a badly positioned thigh, she vowed that the next time she disembarked from Paris Hilton's luxury automobile while a dozen camera-wielding "fans" aimed their telephoto lenses at her ladyparts, she'd helpfully hike up her skirt and deliver the unobstructed view they so assiduously sought. She'll undoubtedly be more pleased with these results than she was with her previous effort, but as a perfectionist, she won't be able to easily quell the nagging feeling that the photographers didn't capture her labia's good side, and will insist on exiting through the driver's side door on her next trip to Hyde.

Nicolette Sheridan is going to have to try a little harder if she hopes to break the hammer-lock that Desperate Housewives co-star (and fellow Emmy snubee) Eva Longoria has on the gossip rags. A simple nip-slip (even a double-slip, admittedly a nice touch) isn't going to get the job done, especially with Longoria's flacks working so hard to establish her as Hollywood's leading media whore. Sheridan would need the equivalent of five simultaneously exposed nipples to compete with a single week of Longoria's red carpet output.