LAS VEGAS — It only took 24 hours for the Stockholm Syndrome to set in. It was after the huge, boomerang-sized crab legs had been cleared away and the Wagyu beef had been consumed and all the after-dinner whiskeys had been drained and they'd ushered us past the hundreds of ordinary suckers and through the VIP entrance of the Caesar's Palace nightclub and set us up with a private table and bottle service so we could recline on a couch and watch all the drunk bachelorette party girls shake their asses at the bar in front of us, and the doorman smiled warmly at us and the attractive waitress smiled warmly at us and the PR people smiled warmly at us and we, the journalists, all smiled warmly at each other and took it all in, and I thought to myself, "Vegas, baby!" Vegas, baby. It likes me. And I like it.

The desperate deluxe Trump Taj Mahal Casino Resort in gross glamorous Atlantic City features the best of everything, naturally. But now guests at Donald Trump's vomit-tinted Xanadu can look as great as the Taj makes them feel, as the hotel is awarding a $25,000 plastic surgery gift certificate to one lucky card player, good for "mix and match surgeries, including breast enhancements, tummy tucks, liposuction and face lifts." But why go so run-of-the-mill, when you could instead use that money to have the hair from a giraffe's nutsack grafted directly onto your scalp, which you might then style in a fetching, comb-forwarded fashion that's sure to excite your mail-ordered, Slovenian succubus bride? You do deserve the best, after all. [AP, photo via Getty]

The Sahara Hotel and Casino, one of the anchors of old Las Vegas, where Sinatra sang and the Rat Pack played, is closing, due to money problems. It's been around since 1952. It's seen the entire rise and fall of the Las Vegas legend unfold, and its loss will be, in many ways, a sad sign of a once-great desert oasis kingdom returning, slowly, to the very sands from which it came.

Las Vegas police have arrested two men in connection with yesterday's heist of $32,000 in chips from the Rio All-Suite Hotel & Casino. The driver's been arrested; the man who police say received more than half of the stolen chips has been arrested; and police are searching for Steven Gao, who they say pulled the stick-up heist himself. These arrests come just weeks after 29 year-old Anthony Carleo was arrested for his spectacularly not-well-thought-out heist of $1.5 million in chips from the Bellagio.

Las Vegas police on Wednesday arrested 29-year-old Anthony Carleo for allegedly robbing the Bellagio Casino for $1.5 million in chips, while brandishing a pistol and wearing a motorcycle helmet. Carleo was busted after bragging about the robbery on the internet.

Pennsylvania Gov. Ed Rendell has never filtered his words very well. And now that he's 11 days from leaving office, he'll say anything. He's unhinged! He'll even yell through clenched teeth at 60 Minutes' "idiot" and "simpleton," Lesley Stahl!

A masked gunman swiped $1.5 million in chips from the Bellagio Casino in Las Vegas early this morning before making his getaway on a motorcycle.

Macau casino owner Stanley Ho has a thing for truffles: The billionaire yesterday paid $330,000 for two giant white truffles from Italy—weighing a total of 2.87 pounds. He's done this before, too. Proceeds will go to charity.

Donald Trump came down from Trump Tower yesterday to testify in court that Trump Entertainment Resorts needs the Trump name if the Trump casinos will be successful again. Everyone disagrees, but he's holding his name hostage. Trump!

Were you aware that Sex and the City slot machines are coming soon to Las Vegas' classiest casinos? They are. (And they pump out lines from the show—like "Hello, lover!"—every time someone hits a jackpot. Cool!) Chris Noth made a personal appearance in Sin City a couple of weeks ago to unveil the new machines. The speech he gave in honor of the momentous occasion appears after the jump for your viewing pleasure.

A casino could be coming to the Hamptons in the near future. Washington indicated yesterday that it's prepared to grant official recognitition to the Shinnecock Indian Nation, a tribe that occupies 800 acres in Southampton, "not far from some of Long Island's wealthiest communities and expansive celebrity-owned estates."

Judging purely by outward appearances, you might guess that Learning Annex instructor Donald Trump is still some sort of "big wheel" in the casino business. But actually he is barely even in the business any more, because he's a loser.

Donald Trump and daughter Ivanka have given up on their bid to regain control of Trump Entertainment Resorts, the bankrupt company that controls the three crumbling Atlantic City casinos that bear the Trump name. In other not-so-encouraging news for the family, it's now considered "likely" that lenders will soon foreclose on Trump Soho, the epically troubled condo/hotel on Spring Street. Some good news? If you're feeling drowsy this afternoon, a visit to the Trump Soho website will wake you up and that's totally free of charge. [WSJ, Curbed]

And you thought there weren't any decent jobs out there. The New York-New York hotel/casino in Las Vegas is looking for a "spokesperson" to interact with its guests on a daily basis. Naturally the low-rent venue is looking for someone with "true New York attitude" to assume the role. So it's now casting "Vinny," someone with a "eats chicken wings, sings drinking songs and dances an Irish jig." (The hotel is hoping to combine Italian and Irish stereotypes into a single character, apparently.) You'll need to be good at playing video games, know a lot about sports, and be pretty good at stand-up comedy to make the cut. If that describes you—and you enjoy making small talk with old ladies from the Midwest—you should probably head to the airport as soon as possible. You can thank us later. [WBTV]

So much for Donald Trump's plan to swoop down and retake control of his old Atlantic City casino empire, which went bankrupt for a third time a few months ago. Investors who are out $1.25 billion—and who stand to gain nothing from Trump's bid to buy back the company—are calling Trump's plan "a brazen insider deal," have asked a judge to conduct a full investigation, and have submitted their own proposal to take back control of the company. [AP]

Good news, gambling addicts with houses in the Hamptons! The Shinnecock Indian Nation is one step closer towards gaining official recognition from the federal government, a designation that would permit the tribe to open a casino. In Southampton. And they've already reached out to Gov. David Paterson to get the ball rolling!

Oh some casino called, quote, "Indiana Live!" thought it would be so cool to have an ad with a fake Barack shilling for their casino, called, again, "Indiana Live!" It was not cool with Barack.

Sam Nazarian is "a rich kid from Beverly Hills" who spent his 20s becoming a Hollywood club mogul, hangs out with Salma Hayek, bought a house next to Leo DiCaprio, and played himself on an episode of Entourage. Now he's 32, and he's determined to bring his special brand of awesome party magic-which "draws such names as Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan"-to Las Vegas. He's gonna make Ocean's 11 come alive again, baby, yea! And his PR team demands you respect his hustle:

With the Atlantic City casinos closed down to celebrate the New Jersey budget crisis, would-be gamblers are treated instead to a horrible "deafening quiet" — no ringing of slot machines, cheering of craps players, or shrieking of adenoidal prostitutes. Nevertheless, if you were planning a summer weekend's AC excursion, you still have options. Donald Trump's loss is the Mashantucket Pequots' gain; the tribe's Foxwoods Casino is still open for business, and they've even added extra buses! If you'd already shed enough dignity to overnight in Jersey, how much worse can it be in Connecticut?