Reality TV star Donald Trump was on Letterman tonight braying about how much he loves pageant broads and how Carrie Prejean was crucified on a wooden cross just like Jesus because mean people hate her for being so damn hot.

Oh good! Carrie Prejean, the brave stateswoman who stood up nobly at a Miss USA pageant and said that gay people shouldn't have equal rights, has landed a book deal with prestigious imprint Regnery. Andrew Breitbart is so excited!

• News of Walter Cronkite's death on Friday evening didn't generate a Michael Jackson-like reaction, but the hour-long CBS News special honoring him on Sunday proved a ratings winner. In related news, the network will continue airing Cronkite's voice-over introducing the CBS Evening News. [NYT, NYT]
• Is Janice Min leaving Us Weekly? That's the rumor, at least. [P6]
• Fashion magazines are looking a little thin this fall, not surprisingly. [MW]
• Padma Lakshmi is in talks with NBC to star in a sitcom. [Variety]
• More changes are afoot at Interview: Evan Schindler is the troubled mag's new president. And Stephen Mooallem has been named editor-in-chief. [NYT]
• As expected, the new Harry Potter movie mopped up at the box office this weekend with $79.5 million in ticket sales. The big loser? Brüno, which fell to fourth place as sales plummeted 73 percent. [EW, Variety]

The attorney for Carrie Prejean, disgraced pageant broad and the most wind-maligned human in world history, is claiming that she's the victim of an evil plot by dastardly pageant officials who want to destroy her, and is threatening a lawsuit.

Matt Lauer is on fire when it comes to booking developmentally delayed Republican ladies. First it was Sarah Palin this morning, followed by Carrie Prejean, who says her "dethroning" as Miss California was a set-up just like Marion Barry.

• It looks like it's over for Paris Hilton and boyfriend Doug Reinhardt. Please excuse us while we go get a big box of tissues; we really weren't mentally prepared for news this upsetting this morning. [People, Sun]
• A couple of weeks ago, it was Gwynnie Paltrow who was getting blamed for setting A-Rod up with Kate Hudson. Now real estate "superagent" Adam Modlin is taking credit for brokering the transaction. Go figure. [NYDN]
• Maybe Kanye West and Amber Rose didn't break up, after all. Or maybe they did break up, but they're spending a lot of time together anyway? It's a mystery, really. [P6]
• Coco Rocha is not going to be an intern at Vogue this summer. She's just spending a lot of time there so she can "learn more about the business." [WWD]

Donald Trump, who owns the Miss USA operation, wouldn't take away Carrie Prejean's Miss California crown after she bashed gay marriage or when she posed nekkid. So what's a fireable offense? Apparently, thou shalt not be more famous than him.

Noted beauty contest loser and porn model Carrie Prejean guest-hosted and Fox & Friends this morning, and she basically dry-humped Steve Doocy and Brian Kilmeade the whole time. Easy Carrie! Brian and Steve won't get you anywhere. If you want the permanent gig, you're gonna need a loofah.

Well this is certainly a ripe little gossip story—-Remember Carrie Prejean, disgraced anti-gay marriage pageant broad and perhaps the most wind-maligned person in all of human history? Well, Star is claiming that Prejean's mother is a SECRET LESBIAN!

Paris Hilton's neighbor offered her landlord money to throw her ass into the street, Mel Gibson has definitely knocked up his Russian girlfriend/mistress, and A-Rod is boning romantic comedy actress Kate Hudson.

Shia LaBeouf codifies a Jewish stereotype, Broadway still hates Jeremy Piven, Larry King lives on despite being 132 and not having Carrie Prejean on his show, and Alicia Keys is dating some rapper guy.

Carrie Prejean, the clinically stupid "opposite marriage" proponent and wind-challenged pornography model, will fill in for Fox's Gretchen Carlson (Miss America '89), on Fox & Friends later this month.

Tom Hanks' sex scenes were cut from Angels & Demons, Olivia Palermo joins Elle, and John Mayer tries to get girls to sleep with him by text messaging "I want to tuck you in."

Disgraced pageant broad Carrie Prejean was all over the morning shows today, braying about how she's NEVER willingly posed nude, but, ugh, you know, there's a chance even more nude photos of her may emerge.

Who shall stand up in defense of no-offense-but-no-gaymars-please Miss California, Carrie Prejean? Besides certain parts of the straight male anatomy, HAHA? Tabloidian sex fiend Andrea Peyser shall! Hark:

Stephen Colbert turns 45 today. Harvey Keitel is turning 70. Stevie Wonder is 59. Vogue publisher Tom Florio is 53. Tim Zagat is turning 69. Legendary divorce attorney Raoul Felder is 75. Writer/director Alan Ball (American Beauty, Six Feet Under) is turning 52. Dennis Rodman is 48. Twilight star Robert Pattinson is 23. Hootie & the Blowfish frontman Darius Rucker turns 43. P.S. 1 founder Alanna Heiss is 66. Former Guggenheim Museum director Lisa Dennison is turning 56. Social fixture Amanda Cutter Brooks is 35. And Miss California Carrie Prejean celebrates her 22nd birthday today.

• George Clooney went out to celebrate his 48th birthday last week, had too much to drink, and ended up hurling in the VIP area. Clooney denies it was him, though, and says he was just "sitting next to someone who did throw up." [NYDN]
• Cops were called to Lindsay Lohan's house yesterday after a security alarm sounded and officers initially thought the house had been ransacked. It turns out Lindsay always keeps her house that way, which means in addition to everything else, she probably could use a good housekeeper, too. [TMZ]
• Marie Douglas-David has been embroiled in a nasty divorce with her elderly husband George David. Now she has a new man. She's dating a Swedish financier named Johan Saxon, and he's only seven years older than her. [P6]
• Lydia Hearst is going topless—again—in a new movie with Jason Behr. [P6]

Today Carrie Prejean spoke to America and America responded by gritting its teeth and punching itself repeatedly in the genitals. And tonight Keith Olbermann debuted a new segment, which he promptly used to destroy her.

Carrie Prejean, the Miss California who hates gay marriage and does porn, was pardoned today by Donald Trump. She'll keep her crown! But not before she gives a teary, terrible speech.

So Carrie California has been saved. Carrie Prejean, Miss California USA, was granted a pardon by the benevolent Donald Trump, even though she has tits and hates homosexuals and stood to lose her precious crown.