You'd think a professional chef who is also a cannibal would be into some ambitious human meat food, right? Nope! A 21-year-old Russian cook and (now-jailed) cannibal settled for some boring old meatballs and sausages.

Sex criminal Nicolas Cocaign is on trial for beating his prison cellmate, stabbing him with a pair of scissors, cutting him open, popping out a rib, ripping out a lung, and eating it with a side of fried onions.

Traditionally, U.S. states have fallen over each other to offer tax incentives to filmmakers who come and make glamorous "movies" in boring, non-glamorous states. Now, states aren't so sure. Does abundant cannibalism make you want to visit Michigan?

The Way We Live Now: Rearranging the fundamental tenets of reality until everything is just fine. GM's losing billions, which is a huge success. Our wallets have totally disappeared, which is a mark of progress. We're cannibalizing each other. Delicious!