Dick Cheney's memoir In My Time comes out next week, and the New York Times and Drudge Report both got their hot little hands on early copies. It sounds as excruciating as you might imagine: No apologies, no regrets, plenty of self-satisfied machismo. If Cheney had it all to do over again, the only thing he'd do differently is bomb the shit out of Syria.

You've probably never heard of Marty Martin. He spent most of his life as an anonymous CIA operative. But he very recently came out of the closet as the man Bush put in charge of finding Osama bin Laden in the aftermath of 9/11, and guess what? It turns out the man Bush put in charge of finding bin Laden is an extremely shady and allegedly corrupt war profiteer. Who would have thought?

John Wheeler, the defense contractor who served in three Republican presidential administrations and was found dead in a landfill on New Year's Eve, was acting crazy before his death — and may have tried to burn his neighbor's house down.

Former Bush administration Attorney General Alberto Gonzales, that crony everyone hated several years ago, has enlisted 23 former Cabinet colleagues to help raise money for his endless legal bills. Read their joint letter and contribute here! Or do something else.

Brad Graham has a book out Tuesday on Donald Rumsfeld titled, By His Own Rules: The Story of Donald Rumsfeld. In an excerpt from the book in this week's Time, Rumsfeld blames the liberal media for cultivating his poor image.

Damsel Dowd in distress! President Bush to the rescue! During Bush's eight-day trip to the Middle East, the titian-topped Times columnist caught a doozy of a stomach bug and was rescued by the White House, who gave Dowd access to Dubya's doctor and a ride home on Air Force One. Awww. Frankly, we're surprised the administration let MoDo anywhere near a Bush itinerary, let alone an invitation to come along. Interesting little side note? The Washington Post reports that news organizations could pay more than $20,000 per journalist along on the journey. [WP]