If you're a fun girl of drinking age who lives in the D.C. area, why not go to a stranger's wedding with a guy off Craigslist? He seems "all right," what with his picture of him riding a lion that is riding a horse, and his degree and good career. He actually kind of sounds like a "catch," plus this wedding is Open Bar.

Who is the biggest bro in the presidential race? It's probably the most important question that we'll answer in this election cycle. Barack Obama drinks a lot of beer ("Consumer research," The Washington Post writes, "shows that beer is most popular with the very voters that Obama and Romney are fighting over: middle-America independents.") — but Mitt Romney has an M.B.A. Paul Ryan ("the frattiest veep candidate in American history") loves Rage Against the Machine — but Joe Biden went to the University of Delaware. So who can call himself the Bro Candidate?

"I really do feel like it's an organizational-culture thing with CrossFit that breeds that type of asshole."

Tucker Max, Chad-in-Chief of the Beer Division of the Pussyhound Brigade (Duke Chapter), is back with an astounding and incredible offer for all you losers out there who would do just about anything to achieve your life goal of licking Tucker Max's sneakers clean as he Googled "misogynist slurs" and then read off every single entry, at you. You could be Tucker Max's new research assistant. Doesn't that sound great? A great job? Bitch?

Many years from now, when you've settled down with a nice girl and stopped drinking the beer and being rowdy with the fellas and harassing bitches (but only the ones who wanted it), your young daughter, who was just perusing some old historical documents, will come to you and ask, with childlike wonder: "Daddy? What's a bro?"

Seems like it was only last week when we decided that we needed to come up with a new word for "bro." What a journey it's been.

Yesterday we asked you, the professional etymologists that make up the vast bulk of the Gawker readership, to suggest a new word to replace "bro," so that we may be freed from the yoke of having to called people "bro," as we do now on a regular basis.

Bros. They're here. They're bros. Get used to it. They're not, however, poetic. "Bro." It sounds like an Eastern European cough. Can you think of a better word for these creatures?

Bros. They are everywhere, and they are unstoppable. Their mission: to return to the womb.

Consider the state of the pitiful American Man: beset on all sides by Spanx and fancy shampoo, tricked into doing crunches and grooming eyebrows, bereft of any healthy masculine role models. Gone is the American Man; in his place, the American Bro. And he is desperate to commune with his own kind.

Congratulations, American readers: cinematic bro blogger Tucker Max's new book debuted at #3 on the New York Times bestseller list. Since it's called Assholes Finish First, we can still laugh at him. But it's a sort of hollow, depressed laugh.

Brah scent AXE has a new product called "Ex-Friend," which describes your social life after you start wearing AXE. In this latest ad from Argentina, it's embodied as a sexually-harassing mute fisherman apparently bent on rape. Sounds about right. [Copyranter]

Oh fucking snap bros, drop everything and rush down to the Borders on Wall Street, where Tucker Max is just finishing a book signing! His new book comes out today! Send pics! Send reviews! Send medication! It's on again! Damn.

Drinking is great! Drinking is fun! And YouTube is full of dudes just chilling and doing ridiculous things while intoxicated. Still, there's a difference between being drunk and being drunk. Here are ten of the drunkest guys ever videotaped.

Vince's new lease on life, Ari's plans for world domination, Turtle's, well, Turtle-ness, and the rest of the Entourage's adventures are back this Sunday. Who literally goes down in flames? Check the trailer and behind-the-scenes peek, then guess away.

Currently, the White House is considering either Jan. 26th or Feb. 2nd for Obama's first State of the Union Address. Do you know anything else that is on Feb. 2nd? Yep: The 'Lost' premier. Obama is definitely a communist.

Tucker Max's movie "Poop: My Story" is really, objectively not doing well, at all. We'll just delicately link to the weekend's movie chart, with no overt comment. However! The sycophants on Tucker Max's message boards have an alternative view.

"There aren't a whole lot of people in culture that are unapologetically masculine." This sentence was uttered by Tucker Max, in response to a question from Carson Daly last night. Again: Tucker Max, Carson Daly, unapologetic masculinity. That is all.

As you all know, we've just concluded the opening weekend of Tucker Max's film debut, "Alcohol and Poop Go Together Like Whores and EZ Cheez." How grand a mark has it made on cinema history? Let's go to the scorecards!

Here's our artist friend Tucker "Tucker" Max (who am I to make fun of names?) on the "Lemondrop" radio show scoffing at the notion that he would ever email Gawker, that's ridiculous. Huh.