According to Page Six, Salman Rushdie's ex-girlfriend says he's "cowardly, dysfunctional, and immature" and won't stop talking about Padma Lakshmi, the one that got away.

While not everyone is surprised by Clay Aiken's decision to come out of the closet (speaking to Extra, Simon Cowell said dryly, "It's like being told Santa Claus isn't real"), there is one sort of person who's had to take the workday off to burn Anthropologie candles and listen to "Bridge Over Troubled Water" on repeat, and she is the "Claymate." Aiken's most ardent fans are predictably in a lather about the revelation, with reactions running the gamut of the Kübler-Ross cycle of grief (albeit with more emoticons).

In an unprecedented move that threatens to undermine the sacred premise of future installments of ABC's blockbuster TV-matchmaking franchise The Bachelor, America's heart was cleaved in twain as Brad Womack (billed repeatedly as The Sexiest Bachelor Yet!) refused to pretend that he'd fallen for any of this season's desperate-for-companionship contestants and offer one of the show's trademark, temporary-commitment-affirming engagement rings to either finalist, walking away from the the series finale as a single man.