Just after the New Jersey governor's damage-control presser, a Chris Christie classmate and Port Authority appointee who engineered a traffic jam in Ft. Lee last September pled the fifth in a state Assembly hearing. The official, David Wildstein, lost a fight to avoid testifying about "Bridgegate" earlier today.

Chris Christie wants your pity. He is just a poor humble ex-investigative attorney and strongarm governor who had no idea his closest advisors planned a four-day traffic jam for political retribution, because, geez, he asked everyone if they were involved, and they said no, and man, that makes him "sad."

There's one thing missing from the recently unearthed emails that show Chris Christie's underlings conspired to jam up traffic for political revenge: Any messages from Christie himself. He claims he knew nothing of it. He claims, in other words, that he's not an evil string-puller, just an ineffective slackjaw.