During all previous recorded human history, small butts on women were preferred. But now people prefer larger butts on women, according to the crack buttock analysts at the New York Daily News. Again: fat-bottomed girls are attractive, which is new.

Is Hipster Grifter Kari Ferrell the type of person who'd write an essay about "the part where his cock was all stagnant in my butt after the mom assault?" The answer may surprise you! Probably not, though. [AnimalNY]

Andrew Adam Newman reports: Corporations are helping you, the consumer, learn that your butt could probably use a little wet wipe down there, if you know what the corporation is saying.