Bill Dance has a TV show about fishing. Bill also messes up in more ways than you can imagine. But Bill's failures aren't going to waste, because they are THOROUGHLY entertaining.

These Anchorman moments are an epidemic. WABC 7's Bill Ritter got his tongue tied up on Tuesday night's broadcast calling Bernie Kerik a "former New York City top cock." Check out the video.

The New York Times' Charlie Savage can write a whole book about The Presidency, but he can't figure out how to operate a lapel mic. This proves that New York Times people always think they're so smart, but they're not.

Wow, the intoxication fatigue of the inauguration really wears reporters down to babbling idiots. Witness this wacky error reel from a single episode of Anderson Cooper's show yesterday! Amazing. Red Bull gives you wings, AC.

MSNBC moved to protect America from Joe Scarborough and his vile, cursed curses. According to Broadcasting & Cable, the Morning Joe host will be delayed seven seconds to hopefully prevent a repeat of his on-air "fuck you" Monday morning. That puts the former Republican Congressman in the same electronic dunce cap as Don Imus, who was tape-delayed by the cable network before he managed to broadcast something racist anyway. There's already chatter this makes Scarborough's show less edgy and "dangerous," but a tape delay can't prevent another nasty on-air fracas between Scarborough and his lefty colleagues, now can it?

So Joe Scarborough was on his MSNBC show this morning complimenting the Obama team for not going around "saying 'fuck you.'" The problem here, Joe, is that you actually said "fuck you" on air, which you're not supposed to do. Rather, you are supposed to indicate the foul word with a placeholder such as "bleep you" or the more edgy "F-you." But then you'd sound like a serious nerd. On second thought, Joe, just keep on doing your thing. Click to watch the historic video clip of Joe Scarborough, television host, saying the f-word, which leads to Time magazine's Jay Carney grinning outlandishly like a third grader whose best friend just called the teacher a "doo doo head."

Ah England, home to both world-class soccer hooliganism and a world-class reputation for stuffiness. What we're implying is that any outwardly polite Brit is, at any given moment, seething with murderous rage. Well! It seems that a BBC radio interview this morning took a turn for the wacky when the interviewee's cell phone went off, live on air! Which caused the host, John Humphrys, to threaten to take the man out back and shoot him dead. Funny Brits! Click to listen to the tape. Gunshot not included.

Heh. Google Maps Streetview is still showing us funny things. We've already had a supposed drug deal, a boob flash, a bicycle accident, and a maybe pretend shooting that were all caught by the little VW Bug with the magic camera on its roof. Oh, and Valleywag shows us that they also caught a house fire! It's a sprawling portrait of the daily drama. And now we have the above photo, which shows a drunken man in Australia passed out on his front lawn. I wonder if the guy driving the car noticed him and decided to include him for comedy value. Streetview is like a videogame with all of its Easter eggs and hidden things except, you know, it's real life. So cheers to our blotto friend, asleep there in his Irish pajamas. May he take a screenshot and hang it on the wall. [TIL] After the jump we've compiled the other aforementioned images.

An Illinois girl exposes her breasts to one of those creepy camera-bearing vans that make the "streetview" panoramas for Google Maps.

Google has announced plans to blur all the human faces in its "Street View" service, which allows you to take a virtual photographic tour of interesting places like Manhattan so that you never have to leave your dank apartment in real life. This is, in all likelihood, to prevent you from seeing any inadvertently captured interesting moments, like drug deals or people crashing their bikes. Google says ""The purpose of Street View isn't looking at people, it's looking at buildings and locations." Whatever. Somewhere on there is a picture of a Google programmer flagging down a hooker. Occam's Razor, people. [AFP]

Yesterday, we dismissed as fake the Internet video sensation clip of a reporter getting bird poo in his mouth during a live newscast. But we didn't quite convince Esquire, who has a cute video piece today on reporter bloopers that includes the spoof. As proof, we offer the full mockumentary from SNL guy Jerry Minor, Arrested Development's David Cross, and Bob Odenkirk, in which a fake reporter gives a fake report about a fake bird in a fake documentary for a fake Nigerian soda company commercial. Special appearances by shouting caricatures of Nigerian businessmen. Thanks to TPG.

Is Mary-Kate Olsen a murderess or is she just really good about picking up her cell phone when it rings four times in a row? Contrary to the New York Post's front page today, cops say they have "absolutely no interest" in talking to Olsen about her role in the events the day of actor Heath Ledger's death. The Post's funny print format that can't be fixed on the fly will look silly all day, but the least they could do is update their website, which is still running with a big Olsen-interrogation splash. Of course, they're not the only ones.

Oops. The mics on Al Roker and his trusty 'Today' team failed to cut away during this morning's weather segment! What were formerly fat Al & Co. dishing about when they thought they were off the air? Nastily enough, it involved Ann Curry, a massage, the phrase "oil all over me," and much giggling. Deep apologies to those of you who just ate. Unfortunately for NBC's morning trio, their little off-camera gaffe introduced a segment on Heath Ledger's maybe-masseuse-related death. Isn't that just hilarious?

This is either the strangest regional accent I've heard on cable news, or one of the best TV bloopers of the campaign. A CNN commentator, interviewed by Anderson Cooper, intended to predict that the nomination would be "hard-fought". It came out "a hard-fart nomination." The clip, after the jump. Wait till 00:31 into the video.