• Madonna's trip to Israel is over. And it sounds like it was quite the party. Her entourage occupied a total of 11 suites and 25 hotel rooms; she brought her Italian chef with her as well as all her own exercise equipment aboard her private jet; and she received the sort of reception typically reserved for visiting presidents. Fun! [NYP]
• Michael Jackson's burial is finally scheduled to take placed today in Glendale, Calif. [MSNBC]
• DJ AM's burial took place in LA yesterday. Travis Barker, Scott Caan, DJ Jazzy Jeff, and members of Crazy Town turned up for the small service. In related news, although Goldstein didn't leave a will, he left behind about $1 million in assets. [Us, TMZ, People]
• The filming of the Sex and the City sequel has been getting a little chaotic, since fans have been turning up in droves at the locations. Fortunately, Sarah Jessica Parker and Chris Noth remain unarmed. And extra security has supposedly been hired. [NYDN]

Mad fans want a piece of Sarah Jessica Parker. Mad ladies want Jon Gosselin. And Ashley Dupre's mad at the haters. Rise and shine! Here's your Thursday morning Gossip Roundup!

• DJ AM's overdose on Friday appears to have been accidental, according to law enforcement sources who spoke with TMZ. It seems the celeb DJ, who claimed he'd been sober for 11 years, only started using drugs again after he was prescribed anti-anxiety and pain meds following his plane crash last year. [TMZ, NYDN]
• Those rumors that Chelsea Clinton plans to marry boyfriend Marc Mezvinsky in Martha's Vineyard this summer are heating up again. A large tent and stage have been set up in the area, although no one's sure if it's for the Clinton wedding. [P6]
• Joan Rivers says Libyan leader Moammar Khadafy was thinking about renting her Fifth Avenue apartment for $200K a week, but recently changed his mind. The upshot? Rivers won't have to worry about the dictator "roasting cows in her living room." [P6]

Heidi Montag wants to be impregnated. Bethenny Frankel wants new friends. And Martha's Vineyard wants to see Chelsea Clinton wear white. Good morning! It's Monday's Gossip Roundup!

Jeremy Piven goes nuts on Chris Kattan, Robert Pattinson parties in Queens, Michael Jackson is finally buried, Bethenny Frankel hates Gwyneth Paltrow, Jesus Luz wants to be a DJ, Mariah Carey is freaking out and Victoria Beckham debuts on Idol.

• The case of the mercury-tainted sushi lives on: Chris Kattan ran into Jeremy Piven backstage during a taping of Alexa Chung's MTV show last week and made a crack about Piven's short stint on Broadway; a very offended Piven responded by calling Kattan's entire career into question. [NYDN]
• Madonna's Brazilian-born boy toy, Jesus Luz, is more than just a model: He's now a DJ, too. [P6]
• Bethenny Frankel is no fan of Gwyneth Paltrow: "I'd rather staple my eyelids shut than watch Gwyneth cook." We're going to assume the feeling is mutual. [NYDN]
• In what amounted to a two-way publicity stunt, Kathy Griffin and Levi Johnston (better known as Bristol Palin's baby daddy) turned up to the Teen Choice Awards last night holding hands. [Us]

• Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore suffered a big scare when the plane they were on was forced to make an emergency landing in Las Vegas shortly after take-off. Fortunately, neither actor was injured and they could return to tweeting within minutes of the incident. [People]
• Leonardo DiCaprio appears to be moving on now that he's no longer with Bar Refaeli: He was seen with SI model Anne Vyalitsyna in Ibiza. [P6]
• Bethenny Frankel was seen in the bathroom of a restaurant with a pregnancy test, so it appears she's looking to reproduce. You've been warned. [P6]

• Madonna is taking her kids on the best summer vacation ever later this month: She's thinking about taking them to visit Auschwitz, so "they can learn about mistakes made in the past." If that doesn't pan out, she could always just invite Sean Penn and Guy Ritchie over for a visit and teach them the same lesson, couldn't she? [YNET]
• Paula Abdul announced over Twitter last night that she's leaving American Idol. True? Was she just drinking again? We'll find out soon enough. [NYDN]
• Hopeless romantic Kelly Bensimon made a move on Gerard Butler the other night, but the actor didn't reciprocate. Try your best to empathize. [NYDN]
• Great news: Ratings for Jon & Kate Plus 8 have tanked since the show came back from hiatus. Say a little prayer that this continues. [Us]
• Nominations for the MTV Video Music Awards were announced yesterday; Beyoncé and Lady Gaga came out on top, each earning nine nods. [THR]

• Cameron Douglas, the son of Michael Douglas, was arrested at the Gansevoort Hotel last week. The crime? He had about $18,000 worth of meth with him, which he was planning to sell. [NYP]
• Mischa Barton's return to the party scene this past weekend wasn't entirely drama-free. She got upset and talked "frantically" as she recounted an episode with a stalker. Then she had a drink spilled on her when she went to a party at the Cooper Square Hotel. [P6]
• So much for Bethenny Frankel's plans to star in her own reality show. She says she'll be back for the third season of Real Housewives of NYC. [People]

• Remember when Bethenny Frankel announced a few weeks ago that she was engaged to "a real estate bigwig" named Jason Hoppy? According to one "insider," the engagement may be a big publicity stunt, and Hoppy may be a "medical sales rep/personal trainer," not some property-owning master of the universe. [Fox News]
• A treasure trove of Madonna memorabilia, collected by one of her long lost ex-boyfriends, is going up for auction. Yes, 17 minutes of "erotic phone messages" could soon be yours. [P6, NYDN]
• Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush have broken up. Tragic! [People]
• It looks like Dr. Conrad Murray gave Michael Jackson a dose of the powerful anesthetic propofol right before his death and that was what killed him. And it looks like Murray could face manslaughter charges because of it. [TMZ, NYDN]
• Mischa Baron says she's feeling better and is ready to go back to work. [Us]

Housewives come and housewives go, and Bethenny Frankel has graduated from the Real Housewives of New York to her own reality show. Who will they ever find to replace her? Well, we have some opinions on the matter.

Amy Sacco's Bungalow 8 has certainly seen better days. But you can expect the club to get a jolt of publicity in the months ahead. Sacco is filming a reality show for Bravo about her efforts to take the faded franchise to Amsterdam as well as open a new "as-yet-unnamed New York club." So what's it going to be like? "It's a reality show, but I don't know if anyone's going to believe my reality," Sacco tells WWD today. "It's going to be funny. It's about what's so awesome about this city, and the great characters I've gotten to know. We've shot with Yvonne Force Villareal, Patrick McMullan and Donna Karan." Just wait until Bravo's marketing department begins to meddle and Bethenny Frankel and Danielle Staub start making regular appearances at the club. [WWD]

• The "unspecified medical condition" that led the police to take Mischa Barton to the hospital on Wednesday? She was placed under a 72-hour involuntary psychiatric hold, and she ended up missing the New York premiere of her new film, Homecoming, last night. [NYDN, P6]
• Britney Spears is dating her agent. But she's also spending alone time with her record producer, too. So she's keeping busy, clearly. [P6]
• Bethenny Frankel says she's hosting a new show called "Skinny & the City," but the woman who already owns the trademark to the name is going to see what she can do about that. [NYDN]
• Two people died in France after a set being constructed for an upcoming Madonna concert collapsed. It's all Madonna's fault, naturally. [People]
• Rubina Ali, one of the stars of Slumdog Millionaire, says she thought Nicole Kidman was "strange" after working with her on a commercial recently. [Us]
• Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's relationship is on the rocks, reports the National Enquirer once again. But the couple has come up with the perfect way to rekindle the romance: They're hoping to film a sequel to Mr. & Mrs. Smith. [NE]

• The police were called to Mischa Barton's home yesterday and she was escorted out of the house so she could be treated for some sort of "medical issue." Her condition hasn't been disclosed yet, but we're going to go ahead and assume it wasn't a case of seasonal allergies. [Sun]
• Bethenny Frankel may be giving up her spot on the Real Housewives next season so she can star in a Bravo show of her own. Neither Frankel and Bravo were willing to confirm the news, though, so we're going to keep our fingers crossed and hope this is just a crazy rumor that has no basis in reality, okay? [P6]
• Kim Kardashian almost got stranded in Africa when she couldn't locate her passport. The operative word there is "almost": Sadly, boyfriend Reggie Bush found it a few minutes later, so she was able to return to the U.S. [People]

• Mariah Carey, Stevie Wonder, Usher, Lionel Richie, Queen Latifah, Jennifer Hudson, John Mayer, and a truck full of elephants (left) will all on hand for the Michael Jackson's memorial service in LA later today. Debbie Rowe and Elizabeth Taylor will not be there, however. [Reuters, NYDN, People, Us]
• Several ladies from the Real Housewives of New York are demanding more cash before signing up for another season of the show. In addition to "six-figure deals," they're asking for clothing, hair and makeup allowances and "a promised amount of screen time." You're shocked by this, we're sure. [NYDN]
• In other Housewives news, it looks like LuAnn de Lesseps may be reuniting with her estranged husband, and Bethenny Frankel is engaged. [P6, Us]

Heidi Klum walking along the Hudson with her mom and kids ... Sir Richard Branson and son Sam sitting in front of their hotel in midtown ... Naomi Watts grabbing breakfast in the East Village ... Harrison Ford arriving on the set of Morning Glory in midtown ... Bethenny Frankel feeding apples to a horse across the street from Central Park ... Kara DioGuardi crossing the street en route to an appearance on Live With Regis and Kelly ... and Olivia Palermo posing for photographers after an appearance on the MTV show It's On with Alexa Chung.

• Just when you thought Lindsay Lohan couldn't do anything to surprise you: It seems $400,000 worth of Christian Dior jewelry went missing following an Elle photo shoot in London. The last person to see it? That would be Lohan, who is now being sought by investigators for questioning. [NYDN, TMZ]
• Despite rumors to the contrary, Marc Jacobs and Lorenzo Martone did not get married in Provincetown last weekend. It'll go down later this summer, however. [WWD]
• Adrian Grenier was seen "getting cozy" with Twilight star Ashley Greene. [P6]
• Paris Hilton says she's just getting to know soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo. Her definition of "know" is probably different from yours. [Mirror]

What we feared would happen last year has come to fruition. Celebrities are having a hard time commanding high appearance fees. A-listers still do all right, but everyone else? We're talking in the four-figure range. Depresso-rama!

A different Real Housewife will co-host the fourth hour of the Today Show every day next week. Kathie Lee is on vacation, so the producers figured they needed new screeching weirdos. Bethenny we're happy about. Tamra? Not so much. [B&C]

New York turned out to celebrate the 75th anniversary of the historic Apollo Theater on Monday night. Prince, Mariah Carey, Steve Harvey, Bill Cosby, Fantasia Barrino, and Chanj all took turns on the stage; Jamie Foxx introduced Quincy Jones, who was inducted into the Apollo Legends Hall of Fame; and the crowd included Michael Bloomberg and Diana Taylor, New York First Lady Michelle Patterson, Patti LaBelle, Dick Parsons, Al Sharpton, Gayle King, Sherri Shepard, Phylicia Rashad, Clarissa and Edgar Bronfman Jr., Ruby Dee, Ron Perelman and daughter Samantha Perelman, Sade Baderinwa, Devyn Simone, Kevin Liles, Jonelle Procope, Susan Magrino, Robin Roberts, Doug E. Fresh, Bryant and Hilary Gumbel, Bethenny Frankel, Denise Rich, and designer (and secret soul music fan) Roberto Cavalli. [PMc, Wireimage, VF]