balls

Who Took Down the Ft. Hood Shooter?

Foster Kamer · 11/07/09 04:15PM

You're a cop, you're on your way to get your car fixed. You hear there's a shooter at Fort Hood, and then what? You're supposed to respond. It's your job. But could you do what Sgt. Kimberly Denise Munley did?

Andy Rosenthal: '...Hanging Ball.'

Hamilton Nolan · 04/14/09 01:01PM

In your hopeful Tuesday media column: Portfolio.com hires(!) people, NYT op-ed-speak translated, Philly papers make an offer you can refuse, and journalists in peril:

Investigative Stories

Hamilton Nolan · 06/17/08 04:25PM

A new interview's out with P. Diddy, in which he discusses how he gets ready for an evening: a nice ball-waxing followed by heaps of cologne on his privates. Now it's time for everybody to go home. [Crazy Days and Nights]

Ball-Powdering Sensation Sweeping The Nation

Hamilton Nolan · 05/14/08 01:37PM

Gold Bond is more than just a powder that old, decrepit men put on their feet; it's a powder that young, virile men can put on their balls, for fun. The medicated powder, and its cream brethren, produces a pleasing sensation in the male nether regions, according to Gawker videographer and ball-experimenter Richard Blakeley. But this off-brand use isn't just some underground deviant fantasy; Gold Bond has now picked up on it for its own advertising. The company has a site called PowderMyEquipment.com with several videos of guys powdering their... EQUIPMENT ("air quotes"). We would take this as winking corporate encouragement of self-pleasure, if we didn't know better. Click to watch an ad from the site, with a guy taking care of his EQUIPMENT, if you know what we mean.

Your Balls, in Five Bullet Points

Rebecca · 03/25/08 12:55PM

CBS News has been running a lot unappetizing stories about sex lately. First it was "Things You Didn't Know About Your Penis" (or "Four Things I Already Knew About Your Penis And One That Grossed Me Out"). Then there was "Top 10 Reasons To Have Sex Tonight" (or "10 Terrible Reasons to Have Sex Tonight.") Instead of waiting for CBS to produce their inevitable list of factoids about testicles, we made our own. After the jump, five terribly important facts about balls.

Everyone Was Groping Christopher Hitchens' "Smooth" Nutsack At The National Book Awards

Emily Gould · 11/15/07 01:30PM

Kirkus editors Chuck Shelton and Elaine Szewczyk (who apparently decided she didn't want her name used in this context after the Daily Intel item went up) both copped a feel of the National Book Award Loser for Nonfiction's junk last night. Chris was showing off the results a his recent Vanity Fair article, for which he'd waxed his "back, sack, and crack." The verdicts? "You cannot believe how smooth it is" and "As smooth as summer cherries."

Emily Gould · 10/25/07 02:40PM

When we were discussing what celebrities blog about, we somehow neglected Martha Stewart, and this is why we shouldn't have: "This most unusual perennial, Gomphocarpus physocarpus, is called the balloon plant. I like to call it hairy balls. A species of milkweed, it is often used as an ornamental plant and is striking in cut arrangements." [The Martha Blog]

Fameball!

Emily Gould · 10/03/07 12:20PM

"I believe I am an early-stage Fameball, and nothing I do or say will change my trajectory. I will attempt to use this to my advantage," Vimeo founder and Star Editor At Large Julia Allison doinker Jakob Lodwick has been quoted as saying. Upon hearing Jakob's self-analysis, our first response was: "we want to quit our jobs." After all, writing about how obnoxious it is that Jakob has declared the process of his fame-accumulation unavoidable is, inescapably, part of the problem. After all, Jakob defines the fameball phenomenon as "individuals whose fame snowballs because journalists cover what they think other people want them to cover." But all that doesn't necessarily mean that Jakob is right.

Corpse Bronzing Is So Hot Right Now

mark · 06/08/07 07:24PM

· Add "corpses" to the list of fun things the Sunset Tan people will bronze, right below "grade-school girls with crazy moms." (And in an amusing side note, our tipster found this clip while searching YouTube for clips of "hot blondes" doing stuff.)
· Mayor Villaraigosa is separating from his wife. Our knee-jerk reaction to this news is the blame this photo of him posing with Paris Hilton.
·A South Park promo puts an unnamed network's "balls policy" to the test.
·Brad Whitford has made peace with Studio 60's demise. We just hope that Tom Jeter's brother gets out of Iraq alive.

'Grey's Anatomy' Sneaks A Swollen Scrotum Past Network Censors

seth · 04/27/07 01:07PM


Viewers of last night's Grey's Anatomy were treated to a suprise cameo appearance—or two, to be precise. As the staff of Seattle Grace stood transfixed, a patient unveiled his massive testicles, which dangled briefly into the frame like a pair of fleshy, deformed grapefruit. As it turns out, the Cisco Adlerian stones were actually the result of [SPOILER ALERT] spectacular genetics, and the patient had merely shown up for his annual physical—a routine procedure that quickly took on intimidating proportions, requiring the combined strength of Drs. McDreamy, McSteamy, and McChokey just to lift a single elephantine teste before ordering the patient to turn to the right and cough.