An article on Saturday about Eric N. Olsen, a substitute teacher accused of molesting in Southern California, referred incorrectly to the jurisdiction of a police spokeswoman, Diane Galindo, who said Mr. Olsen admitted molesting girls over the past three years. The jurisdiction, Ontario, is a city, not a county.

Today show co-host Matt Lauer is in Russia this week reporting on the G8 summit in St. Petersburg, discussing fun Russian recipes and scoring an exclusive interview with Russian Federation president Vladimir Putin. The Today show asked for viewer questions and, not surprisingly, people were unable to shake last week's image of Putin touching a small boy "like a kitten." In a manner perfected by the sexual predator police over at Dateline, Lauer turns the issue on Putin, who explains that he just very much liked the child and the incident was "an emotional gesture." That's sweet, but it didn't help Putin's case when he added that the boy was "completely defenseless."

• Lil' Kim ate well in the joint.
• Rocketboom parted ways with the world's most miraculous pair of breasts. And before we got to make our "More like Rocketboob" joke.
• Even in death, Ken Lay gave life to the P.R. industry.
• Some web site made minor changes, mostly bumping up font sizes and such. No big deal.
• There's Something About Larry: He's a big-time farter.
• Benji Madden got in a fight with a MisShapes kid, which is almost as challenging as beating up someone in a wheelchair.
• Hopefully "I just wanted to touch him like a kitten" sounds less molestery in Russian.
• You never know what's going to happen when you ride the train, but it usually doesn't involve getting sliced in half by power tools. Usually.

Sometimes the jokes write themselves. Sometimes there are no jokes. We'd have to say this falls into the latter category.