Arlington, Virginia boasts the highest percentage of rich millennials of any city in the USA. Americans everywhere urge paper scientists to come together to design a sheet of paper long enough to hold the full list of “Reasons Not to Live in Arlington, Virginia.”

The city of Boston could be “stuck in an endless housing crunch” for years to come with constantly rising housing costs. Oh, you can’t afford to live in Boston? Blessing in disguise. Is this story a joke?