How freaked out was Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) about a possible election challenge from movie star Ashley Judd? So freaked that in February he assembled a secret meeting of advisors on how to use a "wealth of material" from the actress' mental health history to paint her as an egomaniacal "mentally unbalanced" anti-Christian hysterical lady.

After months of half-assed speculation and heartless anticipation, Ashley Judd, America's Charlize Theron, has decided she is not going to run for a Senate seat to represent her home state of Kentucky.

Ted Cruz, the freshman Senator from Texas, has not made nice with his new friends in the Senate, where decorum and comity are king, and the brash antics of the Tea Party a rude interruption to the ceaseless, genteel banter between the ruling parties.

OK, fess up now. Which one of you started the Ashley-Judd-for-Senator rumor? I'm not mad, I just want to nip this one in the bud before to leads to dashed hopes and hurt feelings and Judd taking a year away from acting.

Missing, ABC's Ashley Judd vehicle, returned for its second week last night. The episode featured an especially demanding running-while-screaming scene for Judd, and the Overly-Aggressive Acting Coach was there to guide her.

Here's a trailer for Flypaper, a indie action comedy about a bank being robbed by two bands of bandits at the same time. The comedy duo at the center of all this? Ashley Judd and Patrick Dempsey. Those old cut-ups!

Move over Jen Aniston, we have a new queen of sad jiltedness. And sadness, thy name is Bridget Moynihan. Also today: Two TV powerhouses are welcoming new children into their lives, LeBron's mom is in trouble, and Kanye likes the ladies.

Ke$ha invites Britney to get naked with her. Rosie O'Donnell is on Team Chris Brown. Christina Aguilera giggles at her "hiccups." Lindsay Lohan causes another fender-bender. Tuesday gossip is hit or miss.

The brainiac renegade from Southern royalty is back in a big(ish) leading role. Also today: lots of TV pilot casting news, as it is the season for that, plus a rumor about the upcoming Superman movie that will have you banging a tin cup on the table in excitement.

They're doing something that involves Russians and Americans and it all sounds very dangerous. Also today: new roles for Kurt Russell, the dumb brother from O Brother Where Art Thou, and Morgan Freeman. Plus, the end of an Entertainment era.

Uma Thurman and Arki Busson kissing on a park bench ... Vera Wang standing outside Harry Cipriani on Fifth Avenue and 59th Street ... Whitney Port walking downtown ... Jets quarterback Mark Sanchez having dinner at Nobu 57 ... Sarah Jessica Parker walking son James to school ... Ashley Judd getting out of an SUV in Midtown ... Ashlee Simpson getting out of a cab ... Kristen Bell arriving at Good Morning America in Times Square ... Blake Lively and Penn Badgley standing on the set of Gossip Girl ... singer Charlotte Gainsbourg shopping in SoHo ... and the kids from Jersey Shore partying at Greenhouse.

Famous Judd Ashley Judd has enrolled at Harvard! She is working toward the Kennedy School's Mid-Career Master in Public Administration. That is the program for people who want to, like, run countries or the UN.

Victoria Beckham is turning 35 today. Jennifer Garner is turning 37. Actress Monet Mazur is 33. Liz Phair turns 42. The rapper Redman is turning 39. Architect Costas Kondylis is 69. Writer Cynthia Ozick is 81. Former football star Boomer Esiason is turning 47. Author Nick Hornby is 52. And television exec Henry Schleiff turns 61 today. Weekend birthdays after the jump.

Elisabeth Hasselbeck made a triumphant return to the lunacy-enabling pirate shirt (her favorite!) on today's The View, and you know what that means: crazy outburst time!

Today should be a busy day for thieves who earn a living robbing the homes of the rich and famous: Hundreds of celebs and corporate titans have been in Washington today for the inauguration and are expected to put in appearances at one of the many official and unofficial balls scheduled for this evening. Barack and Michelle will make their first stop this evening at the Neighborhood Ball, where the lineup includes Mariah Carey, Jay-Z, Beyonce, Alicia Keys, will.i.am, Stevie Wonder, Faith Hill, Shakira, and Mary J. Blige. The Equality Ball at the Mayflower Hotel will feature entertainment by Cyndi Lauper, Melissa Etheridge and Rufus Wainwright. Lou Gossett Jr. will serve as host at the Purple Ball, where performances by Il Divo and Peter Cincotti will entertain the likes of Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon, John Cusack, Ed Harris, Ashley Judd, Patricia Arquette, Brendan Fraser, and Josh Lucas.