Though our wintry economic climate provides plenty of reasons to drink, it also leaves us with little money to spend on lavish, unhelpful rehab facilities. How bad have things gotten? Just look at Promises!

"An audience of almost 3,000 clapped and cheered as Woody Allen and his jazz band gave their first ever concert in Poland on Sunday... He received a standing ovation at the end." [AP]

The world is always troubled. So why have fighting in the Gaza Strip and troop moves in Pakistan dominated the news? How disobedient these heathens are, after the Pope just called for peace.

When Courtney Love accused Kim Kardashian's brother of a hate crime, we anticipated the latter would continue the blog war with a rebuttal—we just didn't expect how cagey the response would ultimately be.

Though we understood why Jeremy Piven's ditched Speed-the-Plow co-stars reamed him onstage Sunday, we couldn't fathom what it was that had made Elisabeth Moss allegedly start "sobbing." Then, we saw the Piven-less box office:

As so many stories wind down for the holidays, it's comforting to know that the new developments in Jeremy Piven's Sushigate scandal are even more delicious than the soft shell crab roll at Matsuhisa.

Don't even bother to leave a comment at the Times local news blog suggesting a sexy patrician affair between the Senator-to-be and the publisher of the Times.

Prospective senator Caroline Kennedy is "close friends" (ahem) with Times honcho Arthur Sulzberger, and has maybe been feeding the paper scoops, but apparently some Times writers are now trying to publish damaging dirt. Awkward!

Here's a tip for all those Young Turks out there who think they can tell Ray Liotta what to do in a scene: he has a nice, juicy rebuttal all ready for you.

Muntader al-Zaidi will probably never again do something as awesome as hurling his shoes at the US President during a press conference. But was it worth it, considering what came next?

[Update: Now with video!] Hero president George W. Bush placed his own life at risk today by visiting an Iraqi office, where he came under heavy shoe fire:

First, the good news: Reese Witherspoon has confirmed the postponement of the Cameron Crowe film that would have paired her with Ben Stiller in a supernatural romantic comedy about volcanoes and human sacrifice.

[Venice's St. Mark's Square is flooded with water and light after the strong winds pushed the Adriatic Sea into the ancient city, image via AP]

You may have heard that Larry Summers, Barack Obama's chief economic advisor, has a controversial past. In 2006, protesters at Harvard University demanded he resign as president after he made remarks suggesting women were congenitally dumb. So what did Summers do?

As President Bush continues his farewell tour (just 45 days left to go!) he stopped by a fancy club in downtown Philadelphia (think Trading Places for the unveiling of his portrait. He started his remarks with a joke: "Welcome to my hanging!" It got a big laugh in the room full of white Republicans. It's funny because it's true. See the video after the jump.

Gay men used to be known for their powers of artistic discernment, granting a priceless cultural imprimatur on the only trends, films, and iconic women who deserved it. No longer! Now, when even a reality show fourth banana like Audrina Patridge can have gays flinging themselves onto the pavement of Santa Monica Blvd. in a desperate attempt to be her new BFF, the standards for gay adoration have reached a watermark so low that it wouldn't even reach the hem of $220 capri pants. Thus it is that Tori Spelling has seen fit to anoint herself as a modern-day gay icon, an honor that E! talk show host Chelsea Handler tells The Advocate is simply canny marketing:

It was just last December when knocked-up teen Jamie Lynn Spears attended a showing of knocked-up teen comedy Juno, and oh, how we all larfed! The parallels, they were strong! The imagined glances between Jamie Lynn and mom Lynne, so awkward! Now, though, Star is revealing an extra wrinkle that might have made that Juno viewing even more unbearable: you see, much like our homeskillet Juno MacGuff, Jamie Lynn originally thought she was carrying a "food baby." Sadly, by the time she figured out it was a "baby baby," she had already done something she probably shouldn't have:

Televised child-groper Saxby Chambliss soundly defeated his rival for a Georgia senate seat, with a 15-point margin of victory over Democrat Jim Martin with 96 percent of precincts reporting. This was expected, but still: This is the guy whose advertisement questioning the patriotism of his triple-amputee war-hero opponent was called "reprehensible" by eventual supporter John McCain. Though the Democrats were never going to win 60 senate seats, and if they had they weren't going to be truly filibuster-proof, Chambliss' victory will make the senate all the more fun and interesting, giving the media something to cover other than the president's screaming matches with his secretary of state. Also, with Al Franken still in a Minnesota recount, this election is STILL not over. Jesus.

Jerry Yang's least favorite investor bought nearly seven million more shares of YHOO. BoomTown reporter Kara Swisher did my homework for me again: Todd Bradley, head of H-P's $28 billion Personal Systems group, has been added to the list of potential Yahoo CEOs. Just to keep things complicated, the board my appoint an interim CEO to give off the appearance of someone actually doing something at Yahoo.(Photo by AP/Charles Rex Arbogast)

Lori Drew (right), the 49-year-old Missouri mom who posed as a 16-year-old boy on MySpace, has been convicted of three misdemeanors, but no felonies, in the death of 13-year-old Megan Meier — a former "best friend" of Drew's own daughter Sarah — who committed suicide after being rejected by the fake boy. In short, the only charges prosecutors could bring involved off-topic acts such as "accessing a computer without authorization." Drew's real crime — cruelly manipulating a vulnerable child for four weeks — isn't proscribed by law. (Photo by AP/Nick Ut)