· Paris Hilton goes to the WOW Report's gym, where her workout is monitored by both bloggers and sneaky paps: "Then, across the way, I notice a guy sitting down on the Pectoralis Major machine dressed in jeans and black shoes. He pretends to pump some iron. This is suspicious as everyone knows the Pectoralis Major machine has been out of commission for the last six months. Suddenly, the dude pulls out a telephoto lens camera from his backpack and starts snapping away at Paris while she's mid bench-press! A couple of gays shriek and point at the photographer, and within a few minutes he is escorted from the gym by a staff member."
· Here's a list of things you can do in the same amount of time Nicole Richie spent in jail.
· Anchorwoman almost definitely would have lasted longer than one episode if Steven Spielberg's name was attached to it.
· It's truly the end of an era: Jenna Jameson undergoes a sure-to-be controversial de-bazooming procedure.

And almost as quickly as it began, it's over: Anchorwoman, Fox's bold reality TV experiment in which they sought to find out what happens when a busty L.A. bimbo with zero broadcast journalism experience is placed behind a local news anchor desk (instead of some other busty bimbo plucked from the state beauty pageant circuit), has been pulled from the network's schedule after posting "dismal" ratings its premiere night. In its place will be Til Death reruns. As sad as the news is, no one can say the writing wasn't always right there on the wall—or, more specifically, the Fox Fall Preview '07 website: "How will it all turn out? Only the ratings will tell, so stay tuned for the next ANCHORWOMAN: Lauren Jones." (On a personal note, we watched, and actually enjoyed it—particularly potential breakout star Stormy the Weather Dog, who is infinitely funnier than Brad Garrett, and at the very least should get a talent holding deal out of this.)

· The TV Academy continues cracking down on "the rampant proliferation of the producer credit" by capping comedy series Emmy nominations at 11 and drama nods at 10 for a second straight year. How bad had things gotten? "Business affairs execs and studios were giving people producing credits just because they could," says one nameless Academy official. This outrage ends now. [Variety]
· The Toronto Film Festival officially surrenders to Hollywood. [THR]
· We hate to do this after just one episode, but when the trades are throwing around words like "dismal" to describe a new show's ratings, the CancellationWatch must begin: Fox's Anchorwoman draws only 2.7 million viewers and a 1.0 rating in the 18-49 demographic, less than half of the numbers pulled by competition on NBC and CBS. [Variety]
· Buy your tickets now: Rosie O'Donnell will be opening the New York Comedy Festival. You won't want to miss what she's got planned for that giant photo Elizabeth Hasselbeck this time! [THR]
· In a much-clamored-for reunion of Shrek the Third castmates, Justin Timberlake is joining the cast of Mike-Myers-doing-a-funny-accent-comedy Love Guru. [Variety]

If you hate women, men, Texas, Los Angeles, television news and any of the social progress made by Americans in the 20th century, then "Anchorwoman" is the show for you.