"President Bush will likely nominate Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff to replace Alberto Gonzales as Attorney General, senior administration officials told CNN Monday." It's a pretty good move, sure, but if the president is really intent on taking the Constitution, cutting a whole out of it, and fucking it six ways to Sunday, why just settle for partisan incompetence? Why not go for outright criminality? Dude should tap I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby. Added benefit: Thanks to the ankle bracelet, we'll always know where he is! [CNN]

It's tempting to view yesterday's commutation of I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby's 30-month prison sentence for perjury and obstruction of justice as the moment the wheels finally came off this administration, as the sign that George W. Bush has totally lost control over a process that he's spinned and gamed for so long without repercussion. But we've felt that way before, and we've been proved wrong. Even our cynicism has been overwhelmed by how much these people have gotten away with. We're assuredly part of the problem: As Liz Smith so eloquently declaims this morning, "If all of us who love gossip and celebrity so much only loved history more - with all it has to tell us - I know we'd be better off." Sing it, sister!

"While intelligent observers may be concerned about the negative impact the war in Iraq and America's foreign policies are having on our global image, America today is defined by Paris Hilton. Even in dictatorships, where news from and about America is banned, Paris Hilton is our cultural representative. It is not unreasonable to believe that Paris Hilton is the single most recognizable person in the world today." [TV Board]

"Ratings for the Paris edition of "Larry King Live" exceeded those for CNN's last two presidential debates." [Variety]