Donald Trump, Courtney Love, former Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Barak, and uber-lawyer Alan Dershowitz may have been identified by a butler as potential "material witnesses" to pedophile billionaire Jeffrey Epstein's crimes against young girls, according to a copy of Epstein's little black book obtained by Gawker.

Who is Jeffrey Epstein? A billionaire pervert, yes, but also so much more: a friend to Bill Clinton, a science blogger, an ex-convict, the possessor—allegedly—of an egg-shaped penis. Let us guide you through his life and crimes.

Bill Clinton took repeated trips on the " Lolita Express"—the private passenger jet owned by billionaire pedophile Jeffrey Epstein—with an actress in softcore porn movies whose name appears in Epstein's address book under an entry for "massages," according to flight logbooks obtained by Gawker and published today for the first time. The logs also show that Clinton shared more than a dozen flights with a woman who federal prosecutors believe procured underage girls to sexually service Epstein and his friends and acted as a "potential co-conspirator" in his crimes.

Unexpectedly, something funny in the Jeffrey Epstein-sex-with-minors case: after threatening to sue everyone involved for defamation, high-powered attorney Alan Dershowitz now finds himself the defendant in a defamation suit brought by the plaintiff's lawyers.

Famous attorney and former Harvard Law professor Alan Dershowitz categorically denied allegations that he had sex with an underage prostitute Monday, calling the woman a "serial liar, serial prostitute."

Misanthropy meets assholism in today's Boston Globe to joyous effect, as house curmudgeon Alex Beam reviews a new memoir from preening celebrity-lawyer/lawyer-celebrity Alan Dershowitz. Beam wastes no time getting to the highlight:

Alan Dershowitz thinks Albert Einstein Award-winning physicist Stephen Hawking is an "ignoramus." Guess why.

Alan Dershowitz, O.J. Simpson's lawyer and a man who spent the middle of the last decade spit-shining the idea of institutionalized American torture, would like us to have a moral debate.

Guys, the '90s are back. First Joey Buttafuoco decides to write a tell-all two decades after the fact. And now, 17 years since the O.J. Simpson trial, former prosecutor Christopher Darden is ready to blow the lid off this whole thing.

Harvard law professor and nebbishy Wikileaks attorney Alan Dershowitz is gunning for the Nobel Peace Prize this year. In an effort to really solve this whole pesky Israeli-Palestinian conflict thing, Dershowitz sent Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu a copy of the "Palestinian Chicken" episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm.

Julian Assange's Wikileaks has hired torture-loving, Obama-concern-trolling Harvard Law professor Alan Dershowitz to advise it on how to combat the Justice Department's effort to wrestle data about its online behavior from Twitter.

The New Republic polled the people who really matter for their endorsements in the ongoing primary battle. Yes, finally, we shall get to hear the thoughts of two noted media recluses: famous lawyer Alan Dershowitz and Vanity Fair editor/Canadian Graydon Carter! Dershowitz endorses Hillary Clinton, because Barack Obama is a Muslim. Graydon Carter endorses Barack Obama because Hillary Clinton is not sufficiently yar. [The Star]