Always a candidate, never a winner.

What is next for Herman Cain? The world has been waiting the answer since that fateful Atlanta morn. Perhaps he could be a corporate lobbyist? The big money's there. Or an Applebee's waiter! See how the other half lives and all that. And then there's always the chance to go lesbian for a while in a lesbian art colony. Now's the time to experiment before getting tied down in some career. But no, it looks like he's just going to ride a bus and talk about his tax plan.

Now that Herman Cain's sliding back into a comfortable third place in the polls and no one cares about him anymore, how should he spend all that money he raised while he was the frontrunner? "Converting the campaign into a PAC and paying yourself a million dollar salary for the next few years" would be our plan, and it's probably his for further down the road! For now, though, he'll make fancy cartoons like this one, about the 9-9-9 tax plan.

The great news about a Herman Cain presidency is not just that we'd have a president who hates ever thinking about foreign policy. We'd also get his 9-9-9 tax plan, a cartoonishly regressive transfer of the tax burden to the lower and middle classes! Okay, even our Congress isn't dumb enough to pass this. But. This is what Herman Cain's running on, so why not check out some fancy reviews, hmm?

Yet another poll confirming Herman Cain's rise to the top of the presidential candidate pyramid has come out today. Public Policy Polling finds him securing 30% of the national primary vote in its monthly poll, a 22 percentage point gain from last month. What is going on here?