A good way to routinely bum yourself out is to set "Google News" as your Internet home page. But last night, something magical happened on that usual grid of gloom: The top stories were good news: Pope Francis and Iranian President Hassan Rouhani, the elderly men recently chosen to lead their respective communities, had again made headlines for words of kindness and reconciliation.

The very wealthy have been enjoying the Cronut, which is a fancy pastry/donut thing that costs $40 if you can find a Cronut speculator on Craigslist to sell you one of the magical treats. But now the "other half" can have their own donut fad treat. It is a pile of scrambled eggs and bacon inside some glazed donuts.

Bring the 2010 Illinoize, Central Time Zone! Not the Casbah, but close!