Portland Police Seek Flasher With Intestines Growing out of His Face
Authorities in Portland, Oregon, now have a sketch of the man they say has exposed himself to women and children on the streets for the past month. And something is wrong, terribly wrong, with his face.
The John Doe—who is white and medium height "with dirty running shoes," according to witnesses—last "dropped his pants in front of" a nine-year-old boy on the street on Tuesday.
That's in addition to at least five more incidents in which he either ran around with his pants down or "would expose his penis through the opening in his boxers or completely pull down his boxers then run away."
But there's something else about John Doe, according to the Portland Oregonian:
A North Precinct sergeant worked with some witnesses to develop the suspect sketch.
The sketch includes something around the man's neck. Police spokesman Sgt. Pete Simpson said in an e-mail that it "could be a bandana or his boxer shorts. Descriptions vary.''
Interpretations of the sketch artist's execution vary, as well. Gawker staff reactions to the suspect's alleged fabric neck covering included the following:
- "It's like some Cronenberg shit"
- "that is terrifying"
- "grosssss"
- "i don't ever want to see a face like that outside of a dream"
- "It looks like he's eating a brain."
- "definitely intestines on his face"
- "ed norton's disguise sucks"
Also gross: the fact that this man is apparently sexually victimizing women and children on the street. Go get 'im, Portland. And rip that Etsy Bane mask off for me.