Portlandia is back for its fifth season which means more Jeff Goldblum!!!! And a laundry list of other celebrity cameos, based on a new trailer released today.

Prosecutors say Harold Henthorn—the man accused of shoving his wife off a cliff—was no stranger to killing someone and making it look like an accident.

Two more women came forward with Bill Cosby stories Thursday, adding to the growing chorus of alleged victims who claim they were drugged or raped by the once-beloved television dad.

The ferret's grand ambition was this: to escape his exile on the table and fly free across the great chasm, to the far-off ironing board. His owners ruled everything he could see, but surely they could not rule the sky.

This sketch starring Aidy Bryant was cut from SNL for time, but it should not have been, because it's a fantastic reminder that no one should ever tweet.

A Manhattan spinning studio called FlowCycle offers special "RealRyder" exercycles that "tilt from side to side, mimicking the outdoor biking experience." Imagine—a technology so advanced that it mimics a bicycle. The future is now.

Glenn Beck, person who profits by saying outrageously dumb things, said another outrageously dumb thing Thursday. Specifically, he claimed that alleged rapist Bill Cosby is actually a victim of rape himself—media rape, by the evil and predatory mainstream media!

In the week before he shot four students to death at at Marysville-Pilchuck High School last month, 15-year-old Jaylen Fryberg sent dozens of ominous text messages to friends and family members. "Bang bang I'm dead" one reads. "I set the date. Hopefully you regret not talking to me," reads another.

Since Kim Kardashian posed completely naked for Paper this month, people have had questions for her. One interviewer on the Australian radio station 92.9 wants to know: would Kim let her daughter North (who is a baby) pose nude in 20 years?

If you'd like to hear Tiny Doo's mixtape No Safety, you can do so here. But be aware that by listening to it, you may somehow be implicated in nine California shootings for which 14 men are about to stand trial. Tiny Doo himself is one of those men, and even prosecutors admit that the only crime he committed is releasing his music.

Technology addicts were panicked this week at news of a study finding that looking down at your cell phone is equivalent to placing a 60-pound weight on your neck. Not to worry—there is a solution, robots.

In gross defiance of both our Declaration of Independence and our Bill of Rights, some unemployed British tourists are hoping to enforce a dress code on our free American press corps. Sir and madam, the only rule of dressing on these shores is: Take that crown off your head and shove it up your ass.

The world's tallest roller coaster, The Skyscraper, is scheduled to open at Orlando's Skyplex in 2017, and it looks like it'll be a tower of goddamn terror. The coaster's track will wrap around a 535-foot-tall monolith, twisting riders through a downward spiral for four minutes with "no downtime."

If the stock photo above makes you uncomfortable, survey says: you are not alone. It's the top answer on the board.

Seven student activists are suing Harvard University to try to force the school to divest from fossil fuels, citing among other things the risk of "future damage to the university's physical campus as a result of sea level rise."

A Bullitt County, Ken. sheriff's deputy was responding to a car accident this past September when his body camera recorded county fire chief Julius Hatfield making a racist remark.

The Baby Name Critic isn't one to ogle the male specie. She prefers to keep them at more than arm's length. Why, you ask? Because they can physically impregnate you at any minute! And even though the Baby Name Critic loves to critique baby names, she prefers not to be around babies. Also, men are awful (© official slogan of the Baby Name Critic franchise, est. 2014).

The man on the left is wanted for verbally and physically harassing a young boy in Tewkesbury, England, and the man on the right allegedly sexually assaulted a teenage girl near a Kohl's in Newport News, Va. Police released these composite renderings this week.

On September 2, Clemson University sophomore Tucker Hipps was found floating under a bridge near the school's campus after an early morning run with his Sigma Phi Epsilon pledge brothers. It's now over two months later, and Hipps' parents still have no idea why their son died.

Unreleased footage from a 2012 collaboration between Marilyn Manson and Hostel director Eli Roth leaked online last night, and it includes a very hard-to-watch scene depicting Roth holding down and raping singer Lana del Rey.