There's something surreal/delightful about a swishy dressmaking contest provoking such a momentous battle between a couple of bald, middle-aged, Jewish heterosexuals. Yes, Harvey Weinstein and NBC's Jeff Zucker are still squabbling about Project Runway, and, to the chagrin of the show's many devoted fans, seem no closer to kissing and making up. For those of us who haven't managed to quite grasp the intricacies of this particular catfight, today's Times breaks it down: Weinstein, whose company produces the series, tried to move it from NBC-owned Bravo to Lifetime, because he hates Bravo's president Lauren Zalaznick. But Zucker said, hold on, NBC has the right of first refusal to keep the show on one of its channels, and filed suit.

Although it seems like Time Inc. has laid off upwards of 37,000 staffers in the last few weeks, the fact is that that company is still marching slowly towards its goal of 600 newly unemployed people. Today could be the worst day yet; Keith Kelly predicts as many as 250 Time Inc. layoffs by the end of the day. Cottage Living folded late yesterday, and other titles in the company's lifestyle group could be up for cuts today. Please send any layoff details and memos to us just before you walk out the door with the office stapler, never to return. [NYP]

• Anne Hathaway's new actor boyfriend "went after all the young heiresses" when he was at Brown University, which makes him as terrible for her as jailed fraudster Raffaello Follieri, according to Page Six's tipster. [P6]

Remember in the olden days when pro athletes and Olympians would grace our soft drink ads, urging us to guzzle the nutritionally barren sugar water in order to be a champion like them, cognitive dissonance be damned? Yea, if you listen to athletes now, you are old and laughable. The new (and far more appropriate!) face of Dr. Pepper is a 21-year-old kid who makes a quarter of a million bucks playing video games. Why I never! Lazy kids nowadays! There is simply no way not to sound like some parody of Dave Barry making "these kids!" jokes while writing about this development. But what you need to know is that if you have skills with a Wii controller, you better watch out for the geek paparazzi:

Yesterday one of you suggested that the authoress plagued by gambling debts was Margaret Atwood. Which I thought I was funny. Maybe she'll be forced to become a handmaid. Today we have a bunch of items for you, about a divorcing socialite, a rude TV sidekick, a band about to split up, and a pregnant star who's not being careful about her pregnancy. 1) "Which Park Avenue socialite split from her husband when she discovered that he'd been enjoying secret conjugal relations with one of her best friends for years?" [P6] 2) "Which hit television show sidekick kicked an aspiring actress out of his cab after she refused to go to his apartment with him to 'cuddle over milk and cookies'?" [P6] 3) "Which longtime New York basketball legend, whose wife handles his business, has gone bankrupt twice?" [P6] 4) "Which talk-show host has a flatulence problem so bad, he's said to have an assistant follow him around with an odor-vaporizing spray can?" [P6] 5) "Which globally acclaimed band is on the verge of splitting up because the egomaniacal frontman hogs all the limelight?" [Mirror] 6) "This aging, but not old, former B list television actress from a very hit television show and sometime film actress from some very forgettable films is someone with B+ name recognition and a career that has had lots of stops and starts. One thing has been holding her back for years. She thought she found a way to solve the problem but it didn't work. She has always had an alcohol problem but now she has discovered a new best friend called meth. Her habit has got so bad that she cannot always wait for her dealer to come to her. Several times she has had to actually go out in her very conspicuous car and go make buys herself." [CDaN] 7) "Which actress is making a play for her ex? Her husband is a recovering addict, and as time goes by, she is finding it more and more difficult to be supportive. Meanwhile, she has reconnected with her ex, letting him know that she thinks about him as the one who got away. At first the ex was cool towards a reunion, but it looks like her daily phone calls and emails are starting to warm him up. But when the actress’ husband and the ex’s wife find out what’s going on, expect everything to hit the fan." [BlindGossip] 8) "Guess which childhood star who is currently pregnant needs to be a bit more careful about what she ingests? During a recent premiere, sources claim the actress was “totally high on something” and looked like a 'junkie'. it gets worse. A reader claims the actress 'could hardly keep her eyes open' when greeting the crowd. How very sad indeed!" [I'm Not Obsessed]

Yesterday was Alaska Senator Ted Stevens' worst birthday ever: he turned 85, and lost his reelection fight! You commit seven little felony counts of fraud and making false statements, sheesh. The AP called the race for Democratic challenger Mark Begich last night, as he leads by 3,724 votes, with 46.58% of the Alaska electorate not even caring that their million-term senator is a convicted felon and voting for him anyway. Now we officially don't have to write about him anymore, until Alaska voters give his corrupt son Ben a seat in congress. Now the magical 60-seat majority is up to Al Franken's recount (possible!) and the Jim Martin/Saxby Chambliss runoff in Georgia (difficult!). Then the Democrats will do everything you've always wanted them to do. [NYT]

Please Tip! [Flickr]
Related: Wall Street's Neediest: We're Lending a Helping Hand [Cityfile]

Many companies have been busy cancelling their holiday parties in recent weeks. But if your firm is still searching for a little entertainment to spice things up (and you're not interested in having a losing contestant from Top Chef make an appearance), here's one more option to add to the list. Donald and Allison, who operate a site called SopranosLookalikes.com and claim they served as James Gandolfini and Edie Falco's photo doubles on the HBO show, say they still have some availabilities for upcoming holiday events. The couple promises to offer up quite a show if you hire them. They'll happily meet and greet your guests, "present awards," and "do toasts." They're also willing to "argue with each other" and "Tony can humiliate those you want made an example out of," which, come to think about it, might come in handy if the CEO of your company just slashed the budget and fired a big bunch of people.

A collection of all 53 issues of Visionaire—the super-expensive, super-glossy fashion/art mag founded by Stephen Gan—went up for auction last night at Sotheby's in London, but failed to find a buyer. [Unbeige]

We're not sure why execs at the New York Stock Exchange decided to invite a man best known for breathing fire and spitting blood to ring the opening bell this morning. But they did, and Gene Simmons dutifully turned up, and the Kiss rocker concluded his visit by chatting with Fox Business. The "market expert" (Fox's words, not ours) isn't too worried about the recession, you'll be relieved to hear. He's downright bullish! "You know what I'm doing down here? I'm buying. Because the Dow is around 8,000. Guess what? It's going to go to 10,000 before you know it!" Watch the full video for more of Gene's thoughts on the bailout, the state of the U.S. auto industry, and our dependence on Mideast oil.

Ashley Dupre appears to be at the forefront of a media blitz: In addition to sitting down with Diane Sawyer for a 20/20 segment set to air Friday, the call girl who brought down former Gov. Eliot Spitzer granted an interview to People magazine, which in turn has been excerpted in today's Post. Dizzy yet? Here's the money quote: "If she could say anything to Silda Wall Spitzer, it would be, 'I'm sorry for your pain.'" Other highlights:

♦ Less than a week after it was reported that Justin Timberlake had gone into contract on a fifth-floor condo at the Pearline Soap Factory in Tribeca, the pop star has already closed on the deal. According to property records, Timberlake picked up the three-bedroom condo for $4.774 million, nearly half a million less than the asking price of $5.25 million. (He purchased the pad via an LLC called Just Us I.) You can see photos of his new place here. [Cityfile]
♦ Fortress Investment Group co-founder (and former billionaire) Randal Nardone has closed on a "glass-walled duplex skyhome" at 101 Warren Street for $22 million, more than a year after going into contract. [NYO]

The name Candy Pratts Price won't be familiar to the average person in the street, but the executive fashion director of Style.com has been one of the most important people in the fashion biz for several years now, as the hyperbolic testimonies gathered by the Transom at the party for her book American Fashion Accessories make clear. Zac Posen certainly doesn't mince his words: "It's serious, my love for Candy. There's exuberance, and joy...it's fierce." Neither does Francisco Costa: "She's an icon. She has this love of fashion and that's so apropos, it's so right for right now, to have Candy be celebrated."

The Internet is relentlessly eliminating the entertainment value of fame in favor of commerce. In the old days, you'd get a publicist in L.A. or New York in the hopes of garnering the attention of some producer or director and becoming a star. The end result: You get rich by titillating the masses. Now, you hire a "social media marketer" in Malaysia to drum up mentions in blogs to increase your Google rank and thereby win more random Web searches. The end result: Increased online-advertising revenues. At least that's what we think is what Burt Goldman, an author and self-described "American monk," is after.Internet fame is not Internet fame unless it can be quantified. Goldman has 1,166 friends on Facebook. 88,390 people subscribe to his blog. And he just turned 81. (If, in fact, he exists at all.) How did I learn about Goldman? An email from Amir Ahmad, a "relationship marketing and social media strategist" from an outfit called MindValley Labs. MindValley cofounder Mike Reining wrote up how he parlayed a YouTube video by Goldman into $3,400 in sales of Goldman's home meditation product. And Reining, of course, is selling his ability to sell whatever you're selling. On the Internet! From the comfort of your home! (The pity of it all: Ahmad's pitch was so nakedly brazen that it succeeded in getting me to write about Goldman.) This is the future: Why become a celebrity and then wait until your career starts to wane before you start to cash out with infomercials? Why not just go straight to the hard sell? This is the future Google is building for us, with its search results, keyword ads, and countless videos: We will all have something to offer. And you will know us by our sales.

It was odd, wasn't it, that Britain's Guardian, of all publications, was first to report Hillary Clinton planned to become Barack Obama'sSecretary of State? The paper's DC bureau chief, according to today's Observer, "said... his source said he could use the information as long as he didn’t source it." One tipster of ours, apparently speaking speculatively, is certain the source has to be Sidney Blumenthal, who was a senior unpaid campaign advisor to Clinton during her campaign, was an aide in Bill Clinton's White House and — key detail — has a column at the Guardian, presumably handled by the DC bureau, since that's where he lives.

Calvin Klein turns 66 years old today. Chef (and axed Dancing with the Stars contestant) Rocco DiSpirito is celebrating his 42nd. The Today show's Ann Curry is 52. Larry King may look 100, but he's (only) turning 75. Former GE CEO Jack Welch is 73. Ted Turner is 70. WNYC president Laura Walker is turning 51. Book publisher Julie Grau is 45. Jodie Foster is 46. Model Daria Werbowy is turning 25. Meg Ryan is turning 47. Sportcaster Ahmad Rashad turns 59. Actress Allison Janney is 49. Former Olympic gymnast Kerri Strug is turning 31. And TV legend Dick Cavett is 72 years old today.

♦ The Ashley Dupre press bonanza begins: In her first print interview with People, which hits newsstands on Friday (the same day she'll appear on 20/20), Dupre says she's just a "normal girl" who has "a lot of depth," and that she feels sorry for Silda Spitzer, but doesn't blame herself for Eliot's downfall. [People, NYP]
♦ Are Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin splitting up? The two have spent very little time together since this summer, and now she's become "very good friends" with Fontainebleau hotel owner Jeff Soffer. Gwynnie reportedly spent time with Soffer (and his Bentley and yacht) this past weekend in Miami. [P6]
♦ Britney Spears is supposedly dating a 27-year-old model named Marco D'Angelo who she met through friends in Las Vegas. [Star]
♦ It looks like Anne Hathaway is attracted to lovable losers, since people who know her new boyfriend, actor Adam Shulman, say he's an "opportunist" who "went after all the heiresses" when he was a student at Brown. [P6]

♦ The U.S. consumer price index fell 1.0 percent in October compared to the previous month, the biggest drop in 61 years. [WSJ]
♦ Citigroup is liquidating another one of its hedge funds after it plunged 53 percent last month. Also: Citi's stock dropped to its lowest level in 13 years yesterday. [FT, NYP]
♦ Just because he spends his days taking aim at Wall Streeters doesn't mean Andrew Cuomo left any bigwig financiers off the guest list for his birthday party/fundraiser on Dec. 2. [NYP]
♦ The CEOs of GM, Ford and Chrysler who pleaded poverty in front of Congress yesterday flew their private jets to get there. [ABC News]
♦ Most hedge funds are pulling back right now, but hedge fund king John Paulson actually celebrated on Monday night with a lavish dinner for more than 100 at the Metropolitan Club. [DB]

Chris Matthews is becoming the Rodney Dangerfield of TV news hosts. Even his NBC colleagues at the Tonight Show give him no respect. Host Jay Leno just last week led with dashing Matthews competitor Anderson Cooper of CNN, who was first to sit on Leno's couch and got extra time to chat after a commercial break. Matthews? After flying to LA for the appearance, he came out last night after a segment called "Things We Found On eBay," two turns on the couch by self-styled redneck Larry The Cable Guy AND after a special skit involving Larry. Then Larry insulted Matthews with a joke about "The Chris Matthews Show," not realizing the program is known as Hardball (UPDATE: Joke's on me — that's an actual show! I guess Matthews looked annoyed at being interrupted so crudely, or somesuch). Leno awkwardly tries to salvage the situation in the clip after the jump.

The hip hop star MIA on marrying Ben Brewer, the son of Edgar Bronfman Jr.: "I've always had that f**k-the-system mentality, and his dad is so 'the system.' But then, they're the most liberal family—they bootlegged alcohol, for God's sake. They're rich because they threw big, illegal parties, so I don't mind." [Page Six]