Tra la, our superstar economist friend Nouriel Roubini is back in the news! Roubini, a.k.a Dr. Doom, is still upset with us for the whole "Vagina Loft Party Facebook" thing. But we like him regardless!

"And with the women, especially the straight women, mind and genitals seemed scarcely to belong to the same person." Don't we know it! Here, we save you thousands of words of reading:

Earlier we showed you the horrifying, adult Mouseketeer-like "commercial" for Microsoft Songsmith (do not click that) that could drive the gentlest among us to murder. But at least it's inspiring a YouTube artistic explosion.

Ben Widdicombe wrote his last Gatecrasher column for the Daily News last April. Three months later, he replaced Julia Allison as Star's gossip maven. Is he already leaving? [UPDATED BELOW: Yes.]

Good lord. New York Knicks center Eddy Curry was hit with a shady gay sexual harassment lawsuit earlier this month. And yesterday the mother of his child was murdered, in front of the child.

"Students at Jabalia Prep C Boys School participate in calisthenics on the first day back to school since the cease-fire with Israel January 24, 2009 in Jabalia, Gaza Strip. Schools in Gaza were closed for over 20 days as fighting between Hamas and the Israeli army made school attendance too dangerous. On the first day back, area counselors spent the day evaluating students and creating a light-hearted atmosphere for children to relax." via Getty

The ashamed, secret straight male audience for cats, meanwhile, appreciate "shots of attractive women, with their pets nestled near or within cleavage," as LA Weekly put it in a profile of Chris Leavins, the man behind the Web show and blog Cute With Chris, which offers all of the above.

Why would you think that? Ty Inc., creator of the Beanie Babies, just happened to pick those names, since they are "beautiful." Here, let the flack sort this out for you:

Best comments of the week after the jump!

The attention, it was just too much: Barack Obama 's single, 27-year-old speechwriter apparently disappeared himself from Facebook within three days of his boss' inauguration. We blame young women.

Nobody is buying anything these days. Workers are idle, but they want to look productive. That leads to busywork. Great idea for a trend piece! Turns out busywork won't save you. You are doomed.

Sometimes we all look back on the choices we've made, and wonder wistfully how things would have turned out had we chosen different paths. And sometimes this makes us delusional, like Julia Allison.

Did Bernie Madoff fuck around and rip off often-shot rapper 50 Cent for millions? Yes, if you believe an anonymous snitch who talked to a website that 50 Cent hates!

We're obligated to tell you that Mariana Bridi, the 20 year-old Brazilian model who had her hands and feet amputated over the past week, has died.

Did you celebrate National Pie Day yesterday? I did.

MAD Magazine is about to put out its 500th issue. Fantastic! But starting in April, the mag is cutting down to only four issues per year. Nooooo! Reminisce on some of MAD's fine Obama-related work:

Oh boy, now that Caroline Kennedy will officially not be New York's senator, the real fun begins: time for Gov. David Paterson's people to trash her anonymously! He never liked that bitch anyhow, sources say:

· Defamer invaded Park City for Sundance '09, and managed to get a lot done. We eavesdropped. (A whole lot.)

· Every year, Waxy.org does some impressive spreadsheet analysis of how Oscar-nominated movies are faring in the online piracy sector. Findings: Only Rachel Getting Married isn't available .
· Nervous lawyers pull the plug on Ashton Kutcher's Twitter Nation of D-boys and D-girls.
· Your American Idol David Cook will hit mostly college campuses on his first U.S. tour, to be followed in subsequent tours by malls, county fairs, and, finally, cosmetology conventions nationwide.
· We hear crafts are getting big in these hard times, and what better place to go for your knitting supplies than your own pet!
· We didn't think there was any way you could ruin pancakes. We were wrong.

Friday · The Phantom of the Opera fills the void left by Wicked at the Pantages. Everyone loves Phantom: It has a falling chandelier!