• David Bouley has shuttered Secession, which he opened last fall (and which he'd hoped to save by hiring Christian Delouvrier as chef recently). In its place, he's planning to open a Japanese restaurant called Brushstroke. [NYT]
• Manhattan's Water Taxi Beach debuted this weekend. [GS]
• Noah Tepperberg's new "gastropub/ultralounge," Avenue, will open on June 1 with a party for Mandy Moore. In the meantime, Marc Jacobs held a 30th birthday party there recently for fiancé Lorenzo Martone. [NYM]
• Ruth Madoff is a fan of the steak at Donohue's on Lexington, it seems. [P6]
• The new Baja Fresh opened in Midtown today. [ML]

We got so carried away today with the Prop 8 and Sotomayor nonsense that we totally forgot to peer into the trades and see what showbiz news there is that you need to know about. So here you go now, late afternoon edition.

We don't pretend to understand the appeal of TLC's Jon & Kate Plus 8, but its season premiere brought in a whopping 9.8 million viewers last night—that's more than last week's Lost season finale. So why is this Kate woman complaining that people are interested in her life?

Something else you might have missed if you, like a normal person, enjoyed the Memorial Day holiday without following online media industry news: Gawker found itself in the middle of an advertising-blurring-with-editorial controversy after our sales department and HBO pretended that an advertorial blog was a Gawker editorial property.

The Hipster Grifter is now fodder for Mom-blog advice columns. Truly, she has arrived.

Like hostages whose will for freedom has been completely sapped, slack-jawed Americans aspire only to befriend vapid, idolized television personalities while downing grease-laden comfort food, a new poll has confirmed:

Facebook settled a long-running trademark suit from Aaron Greenspan (pictured), the Harvard student whose "Universal Face Book" system predated Facebook and was used heavily by its founder before he publicly branded his own social network. Greenspan is just the latest mess Facebook has tidied up.

Moving to Chicago? Got about $10.5 million to spend on a new house? You're in luck! JPMorgan Chase CEO Jamie Dimon's Gold Coast home—with 26 rooms and 15,700 square feet of space—is now for sale. Dimon hasn't actually lived there since he left Bank One to join JPMorgan Chase in 2004. But clearly he's timed the sale perfectly. [Blockshopper via Dealbreaker]

Want to meet Supreme Court nominee Sonia Sotomayor?

Today the New York Times named Jennifer Preston its first-ever "Social Media Editor." We speculated she would do comical stuffy-NYT-meets-freewheeling-internet activities like cracking down on newsroom Twitterers (and maybe trying out this "Twitter" herself?). We were correct:

Vimeo founder Jakob Lodwick is now sporting a haircut straight out of Taxi Driver. Which wouldn't be disturbing, except that the young millionaire seems to be having a breakdown that would make a fitting sequel for the gritty film.

Go into the heart of Africa with four renowned explorers as they attempt to follow the historic journey of Henry Morton Stanley and his search for the "lost" Dr. David Livingstone. The explorers face dehydration, deadly animals, disease and each other, knowing that any step could be their last. Don't miss the premiere of EXPEDITION AFRICA this SUNDAY, MAY 31st at 10pm/9c on HISTORY.

OK, OK. Everybody just cool out. Put the pieces down, sit at the table, and let's break bread together. For the record: The Manzo family from Real Housewives of New Jersey does not have ties to organized crime.

Given Social Life is "one of the most popular magazines in Manhattan and the Hamptons" and only covers "the hottest celebrity parties," it's a bit of a mystery why the mag's season opener at the "Social Life estate"—hosted by botorious editor-in-chief Devorah Rose—didn't attract any actual celebrities. Fortunately, "Real Housewife" Alex McCord and her hotel manager husband, Simon van Kempen, didn't have anything else to do and kindly turned up to add a little C-list glam, so the event wasn't a complete disaster. Devorah's big get after the jump.

In your suddenly Tuesday media column: Conde Nast moves its B-team, Larry Hackett despises humanity, and print is dead, along with baseball and apple pie and puppies:

It's been more than six months since Giuseppe Cipriani has stepped foot in the United States, either because he's "exploring new business ventures" in places like Turkey and Dubai, or because he's convinced he faces serious legal trouble if he returns to NYC, depending on which side of the story you choose to believe. But his fading collection of eateries hasn't been neglected, you'll be pleased to hear. Sons Maggio and Ignazio have stepped in to fill Giuseppe's shiny Gucci loafers!

The two Harvard students who were the "nexus" between the alleged shooters and the victim in the Harvard killing last week have been identified—and one of them is saying she had nothing to do with it and charging the university with racism.

We'll give you one guess: Which is the heaviest-drinking class of "professionals" in England? If you said "the media," you are well acquainted with the media's habits! In fact, we hear that some media workers here are going into the booze business as a dependable second job:

["American Idol" runner-up performs on the CBS Early Show this morning; image via Splash]

Marking the release of their my-god sixteenth album on Friday at Home Sweet Home, Sonic Youth brought out a few bands to play covers of their own songs and wear great outfits and pretend they didn't like talking to reporters. Pictures by Nikola Tamindzic and our story continues.