[Model Agyness Deyn in London; image via Bauer-Griffin]

In your inexorable Thursday media column: Nickelodeon magazine folds, newspapers face threats from within and without, Glenn Beck is allegedly a superstar, and the answer to a question you didn't know you had:

When memes collide! Bethenny Frankel, one of our Real Housewives of New York beauties, was spotted in the lovely cafeteria of our favorite newspaper, the New York Times. She was looking skinny. Just like the paper!

June 4 @ 11am [Submit your own Gawker Stalker sightings to stalker@gawker.com] Looking whack as ever. Even whacker, she was getting on the bus. Really, Betsy? Public transportation?

• The newspaper industry may look to take a cue from the music business in its elusive hunt for new sources of revenue. Because, clearly, if there's one industry to gleam some wisdom from, that's the one. [MP, WSJ]
• The Justice Department is looking into whether tech giants like Yahoo! and Google violated antitrust laws in their recruiting efforts. [WaPo]
• NBC's two-part White House special scored big ratings. Conveniently, it also squeezed in plugs for every other show on the network. [HP, Newsday]
• Laura Ling and Euna Lee went on trial in North Korea today. [WaPo]
• Silvio Berlusconi is feuding with Rupert Murdoch. And so now Michael Wolff says he really likes Berlusconi. Business as usual, clearly. [Gawker, Reuters]
• Here's something really depressing to chew on: Glenn Beck is No. 81 on Forbes's "Celebrity 100" list and made $23 million last year. [Forbes]

The Way We Live Now: Funemployed. That's the new word, really! Does it sort of make you want to get gangsters to dispose of the linguist who coined "Funemployment," then flee to live on a houseboat barge? You're not alone.

What could Time magazine possibly have to say about Twitter that hasn't been said in a thousand prior magazine and newspaper articles, and on Oprah? That it drives the American economy. In fact, Twitter is the new GM!

A Current employee has shed (a bit) more light on why Current has steadfastly refused to mention the fact that two of its reporters have been detained in North Korea for months. The legal department's "overzealous." But why?

David Carradine, who died yesterday at the age of 72, was one of those unique American drifter/wander/philosopher spirits. From his martial arts to his music, he radiated a zen-like calm. Here's a brief compilation of the mild master in action.

Yesterday WNYC, New York's public radio station, laid off four staffers and eliminated 11 unfilled positions. As we speak, it's begging for donations with its spring pledge drive. So why does CEO Laura Walker make nearly $500,000 a year?

JPMorgan Chase has started changing over the signage at branches of Washington Mutual to reflect its bargain-basement acquisition last fall. The sign outside the branch on Delancey hasn't been swapped out yet, though. Is JPMorgan looking to save a few bucks by not replacing the bulbs? Or is there some sort of coded message here considering the sign now spells out "Was Mutual"? It's a mystery! [Bowery Boogie]

The man cast to play Bernie Madoff in the upcoming docudrama, Madoff: Made Off with America, is Jersey City resident—and non-professional actor—Paul Cohen. The movie's director, Edmund Druilhet, says he picked Cohen because he "had the best lips." But they share other traits, too: "Both are Jewish, have April birthdays and attended school in the Far Rockaway section of Queens." So, you know, there's that. [Forward, Page Six]

Today is the 20th anniversary of the Tiananmen Square massacre. China is celebrating by attempting to censor every single piece of information, anywhere, pertaining to the incident. Let's review China's tactics for keeping this anniversary a big secret:

Yesterday, Kevin Maher—the ex-husband to real "coke whore" of New Jersey Danielle Staub, told Star that his ex-wife was a "nymphomaniac" who "claimed that she had been with numerous celebrities." Which celebrities? Star didn't name names. We will.

If you see Simon van Kempen on the street, you probably should not approach him and ask him if he's gay. He's beginning to get annoyed by the question! "If I was gay, I would be gay, but I'm not!" he barked at a reporter from Us when he was cornered at the Gracie Awards last night. "I don't want to have sex with men!" But he's not prepared to apologize for his fondness for Speedos either, so be sure to brace yourself if you happen to bump into him on the beach in the Hamptons this summer. [Us]

[To the tune of "American Pie"]

School's out, thunderstorms are rolling in, and flowers are in bloom. Montauk Monster season is upon us. And to ring it in, ASSME's Drew Grant claims to have finally solved the mystery that seized a nation last July.

David Carradine, who starred in Kung Fu and Kill Bill Vols. I and II, was found dead in his Bangkok hotel room yesterday. A Thai news report says it was a suicide, but his agent in L.A. says it was "natural causes."

Here is an actual press release sent yesterday to the editor of GayListDaily.com. That's GayListDaily.com. How stupid can you anticipate the following press release to be? It was sent by 5WPR, America's most inept organization of any sort. Behold:

Easy A just sounds more and more intriguing, though little else coming out of the West does. It's still all remakes and reboots and robots and, sometimes, carnival barkers.