A Dow Jones writer spanked the Washington Post; Evan Williams downplayed his kind of awesome "pre-cancerous" skin removal; and Ron Burkle drowned his problems in models. The Twitterati were lively!

• Coco Rocha may not be interning at Vogue this summer, but Tallulah Belle Willis, the 15-year-old daughter of Demi Moore and Bruce Willis, is spending the next couple of months "shadowing" at Harper's Bazaar. [FWD, WWD]
• Goodwill stores are experiencing a boom, as you may have heard. Sales were up 7 percent in the first three months of 2009 compared to the same time period last year. [NYT]
• The fragrance industry introduces an average of 250 scents ever year. And you know what? That's probably a few too many. [NYT]

Chastity Bono, the lesbian daughter of Cher and the late Sonny Bono, announced late today that she is planning to undergo a sex change operation.

If you've ever wondered what kind of mother Kate Gosselin is behind the scenes, wonder no more. Access Hollywood released this clip today of footage caught just prior to an interview with Kate and her kids, and it's kinda troubling.

It's hard to believe that it's been almost three years since Danny DeVito was interviewed on The View while sloshed on limoncellos. That means he's sort of overdue for an encore, and here it is.

Tim Armstrong, AOL CEO, just bought a company from... Tim Armstrong, investor. The official line is that the deal is on the up and up, since the consummate salesman won't be taking any profits off his stake. Rich.

Barry Diller's effort to pawn off Very Short List, his failed shopping newsletter for the rich, is turning into a classic New York media folly — a big drama over a puny digital property.

[Military brides gather in Times Square to get married in an event cosponsored by the USO. Five couples were married on the island in the middle of the square, like for realsies; image via Getty]

An executive of hotshot talent agency William Morris made the mistake of faxing a memo containing the salaries of many of the firm's highest-paid employees, and now it's all up on the internet. Here's how much they make (a lot):

Former Drudge alter ego Andrew Breitbart thinks James von Brunn was a "multiculturalist just like the black studies and the lesbian studies majors on college campuses." How do we know? He left us an enraged voicemail!

• The Grill at the Standard hotel is in friends-and-family mode at the moment. (It should be open to the public sometime next week.) In the meantime, though, you'll be pleased to hear (and see—left) that some serious bartender training is currently underway. [HotelChatter, Flickr]
• New York's very first spot for 24-hour-a-day pho is coming soon. [GS]
• Chocolate mousse is popping up all over town, according to Kate Krader. Exhibits 1-4: Monkey Bar, Minetta Tavern, Bar Artisanal, and Kefi. [F&W]
• Another list of downturn-friendly bars offering free food with drinks. [NYT]
• Good news for strip club fans: Drink prices, cover charges are down. [WSJ]
• Some breaking news from Tuesday evening's screening of Food, Inc.: Rocco DiSpirito says he's been known to occasionally eat a Cinnabon or two. [NYDN]

A different Real Housewife will co-host the fourth hour of the Today Show every day next week. Kathie Lee is on vacation, so the producers figured they needed new screeching weirdos. Bethenny we're happy about. Tamra? Not so much. [B&C]

Yesterday, Glamour magazine reported that a staffer had contracted swine flu. This afternoon, NBC sent out a memo warning that a couple of employees at 30 Rockefeller Plaza had come down with the flu and while the network didn't indicate if it was of the swine variety, we don't believe company-wide emails usually get sent out every time a grip on the set of Saturday Night Live develops a slight cough. But it's not just swine flu that is making the rounds. The porn industry in Southern California is reeling from the news today that an unidentified actress has tested positive for HIV, the first case to hit the adult entertainment business since 2004. [NYO, LAT]

We know why you're not accepted in the fashion world: because you don't know how to pronounce the names of all those foreign designers. Don't be ashamed. Many people pronounce "Dolce & Gabbana" like uncouth Americans. Youtube can help!

The Senate has just passed a sweeping bill that essentially bans light cigarettes, as they're marketed as healthier when, really, they're not. So no more of your favorite iconic brands, which are mostly smoked by the youngs. Brands like:

Oh. Oh no. Oh no they didn't. Today in "Onion Stories Come True": The city of Toronto adds some diversity—magically!

A tipster tells us—and we have since confirmed—that Insitu, the Gramercy salon founded by stylist Paula Casano and known for its Japanese hair-straightening expertise, has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection. It's not just the salon's curly-haired clients who will suffer if it's forced to close it doors: Insitu is one of the few salons in Manhattan that works with the Locks of Love project year-round, offering free haircuts to women willing to donate their tresses to economically disadvantaged cancer patients. The grim evidence is below.

Frank Addante, the Los Angeles tech entrepreneur, has helpfully consolidated pretty much every terrible office idea and Web 2.0 startup cliché into one place: This video tour of his online ad company, Rubicon Project.

The New York Times is too prissy to mention to print the word fart on their classy website. But vintage Belgian porn? Mais oui, c'est l'art!

One of the strangest explanations Chicago shock jock Erich "Mancow" Muller gave for why his publicist had called his waterboarding "a hoax" was that he risked arrest if she said otherwise. For real? Like Mancow's original stunt, that's a fabrication.