The Pentagon and "patriotic" hawks for years supported a prohibition on publishing pictures of slain soldiers' caskets. Then President Obama lifted the ban, thus giving Matt Drudge an opportunity to create this lovely collage commemorating the Afghanistan war's 8th anniversary.

You should stop eating now, because every food you've ever loved will kill you.

Well shoot! The Cheney family has been doing so well: Dick's found post-White House life; Liz seems poised to be the GOP's next female star. But now that's all gone to hell because lesbian daughter Mary's having a second baby!

The former Mr. Drew Barrymore overcompensated for an apparent drunk-tweet; a New York Times took a screenshot of his writer's block and Zoe Stagg was all backed up. It was a tough Tuesday for the Twitterati.

Sandra Guzman was correct, if soft spoken. The New York Post editor publicly objected to an offensive cartoon in her newspaper. Her boss Rupert Murdoch objected too. But his henchmen just cast her out.

[A man tires of asking people if they like stand up comedy in Times Square last night. Image via TheeErin's Flickr]

Heavens knows what they would think if Stewart just transmitted their intimate off-camera comments to the entire world. The likes of Snoop Dogg might not trust her with their deepest secrets anymore. No, better to keep the Martha Stewart Twitter an occult bible of hellish fire pits opening on the surface of the Earth. Douglas can keep hawking TwitterWit, his printed collection of amusing tweets; Stewart seems more likely to buy — or publish — something along the lines of TwitterWoe.

• Despite rumors to the contrary (and a recent surprise visit by inspectors from several city agencies) the Jane Hotel's Ballroom is still open. [Eater, NYP]
• Daniel Boulud is pumped about his three Michelin stars, unsurprisingly. [GS]
• The Voice's Robert Sietsema, however, would like to see Michelin disappear: "Get your radial-tire ass in gear and lay rubber out of here, Michelin Man. We've already got plenty of unreliable sources telling us where to eat." [VV]
• Hill Country is planning to open expand with a fried chicken place. [TFB]
• Chefs and restaurateurs mourn the closing of Gourmet after 68 years. [GS]
• Esquire magazine's "Best New Restaurants" list is out. [GS]
• The age-old (and elusive) hunt for NYC's best bagel. [Serious Eats]

Brett Ratner has an essay on BlackBook's website about how hard it is to be him because everyone is talking about how awesome Brett Ratner is on the internet. Sorry, but all we could find is people making fun of you.

According to a new study in the medical journal Addiction, abstaining from alcohol will not only make you a lot less fun to go out to a bar with, it will also leave you at a greater risk for developing depression and anxiety. Meanwhile, a study in the Archives of General Psychiatry indicates that those who stick to a "Mediterranean diet" and don't overdo it with the booze are 30 percent less likely to develop symptoms of depression. Needless to say, if you find yourself feeling a little bit down today, it's nothing a trip to Italy or Greece and a visit to a local wine bar can't fix. [Time, Guardian]

One of the last 48 Hours stories that CBS Newsman and accused David Letterman blackmailer Joe Halderman worked on—airing just one month before he allegedly launched his plot to extort the late-night host—involved a ransom scheme. Weird, huh?

OH HO: Politico reports that Obama's chief strategy henchman David Axelrod had a hush-hush meeting with Fox News Slug King Roger Ailes when Obama was in NYC two weeks ago. The explosive, secret conversation, we allege, went like this:

In case the first dozen didn't satisify your desire to smell like a pop star past her prime, Jennifer Lopez has another perfume coming out this week called "J. Lo Glow." (Be sure not to confuse it with previous scents like "Glow by J. Lo," "My Glow," "Sunkissed Glow," or "Miami Glow.") As part of the ad campaign for the new perfume, People reports that "Jennifer naturally assumes a maternal role in domestic scenes meant to reflect the coziness of the new floral fragrance." So to achieve this natural maternal role—and convey what Lopez says is a natural feeling of "intimacy and love"—Lopez must have posed with her own twins, right? Naturally, no. They're actors. [People]

[Jessica Szohr recycles an old line today on the set of Gossip Girl when a crew member measures himself awkwardly. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

Thirty year-old Melanie Chen of Ohio has been sentenced to eight years in jail for soaking friends and relatives for $800k for fraudulent "medical bills" and spending the money on "things that didn't matter." How derivative. [UPI]

Today, Elizabeth Taylor twittered that she was entering the hospital for some experimental heart surgery. That one of the last bastion of old Hollywood superstardom made the announcement on Twitter makes us face some harsh realities.

Two weeks ago, eBay announced a restructuring. As any Silicon Valley trouper knows, that means layoffs will soon follow. And that, in fact, is what's happening.

Working with internet startup Sellaband, Public Enemy hopes to turn its fans into investors, bucking The Man in the process. For as little as $25, you too can become a greedy record executive. Just like those slammed by Public Enemy.

The editor of Towson University's college newspaper has resigned amid scandal. Sexy scandal! The Towson University community was just not ready for sexy mutual masturbation talk. What? It's natural and human. Masturbation 69 orgasm dildo masturbation masturbation. What? Be mature.

• The Condé Nast shake-up continues: A day after the company shuttered four titles, it's ousted the publisher of Details. And rumor has it the Condé cuts may now "inspire" similar such moves at Hearst and Time Inc. [AdAge, NYT, NYP]
• Ruth Reichl says she was completely surprised by the news Gourmet was closing. (She says she's planning to write a book about her years there.) And Gourmet's offices have since been completely cleared out. [NYT, Gawker]
• David Letterman should apologize on his show every night. His latest mea culpa generated better ratings than anything NBC aired during primetime. [AP]
• CBS is talking to Nancy Grace about hosting a Judge Judge clone. [B&C]
• The only big media company hiring and not firing? Bloomberg LP. [Crain's]