• Lindsay Lohan is having another bad week. At the Whitney Museum of Art Gala last night, the "jelly-legged actress" had to hold on to a fence for "dear life" as she "stumbled out of the glitzy bash." But Mischa Barton was looking surprisingly put together, so that's good news, right? [Daily Mail, Sun]
• It's been a few years since Salman Rushdie and Padma Lakshmi split up, but the author is still obsessed with his ex-wife and talks about her "day and night," says Rushdie's most recent girlfriend, Broadway actress Pia Glenn. She also says Rushdie broke things off with her via email and may have been just using her for sex. [P6]
• Ali Wise, the socialite/ex-Dolce & Gabbana publicist who appeared in court yesterday on charges she hacked into a rival's phone, won't have to mount her defense until January. But there are four women now claiming Wise broke into their voicemail accounts now, not just one. [NYDN]

Snoop Dogg turns 38 today. The Office's John Krasinski is turning 30. Tom Petty is 59. Danny Boyle, the man who directed Trainspotting, 28 Days Later, and Slumdog Millionaire, is turning 53. Keith Hernandez, the former first baseman for the New York Mets and now a baseball commentator, is turning 56. Actor Viggo Mortensen is 51. Conservative columnist Michelle Malkin is turning 39. Dannii Minogue, the Australian singer/actress who's better known as the younger sister of Kylie, turns 38. And psychologist and advice columnist Dr. Joyce Brothers is turning 82. And Hilda Solis, the United States Secretary of Labor, is 52.

Carrie Prejean and her breasts are headed to court. The ex-beauty queen turned anti-gay activist is being sued by the organizers of the Miss California USA pageant who say they paid for her boob job.

Billionaire businessman Raj Rajaratnam is out on bail, so he stopped by Galleon Group, the hedge fund he founded in 1997, to give a pep talk to the staff. Things aren't going so well over there!

Andrew Ross Sorkin's Too Big To Fail describes, in intimate detail, the days leading up to the collapse of the biggest financial institutions in America. Did the men in that room pull us from the brink or push us over?

Two South Carolina County Republican Party chairmen defended Sen. Jim DeMint (R-S.C.) by likening him to Jews who "take care of the pennies."

Former President Bill Clinton has a protected twitter account, blocking access unless you're one of the six people he's deemed Bubba worthy. Does a twitter glitch allow anyone to glimpse at what Bill's tweeting? We investigate.

What are state secrets worth to a NASA scientist? In the case of Stewart David Nozette, undercover agents posing as Israeli intel were able to get the price down to around $10 grand. What a bargain!

If you're sick and tired of being treated as a pawn by the Balloon Boy family, you're not alone. In this video, one neighbor is mad enough to get into a fight with 'the media' for blocking his car.

The co-founder of Flickr helped lead a chorus of criticism against Yahoo over strippers; an NYU professor liked a sex-blog post; and Sarah Silverman spotted a very gay gym activity. The Twitterati had sexuality on the brain.

Twitter's revenues will be just $4 million this year, according to a new Wired feature story. But that's not going to crimp its co-founder's swagger: Evan Williams knows Twitter will be huge, and has words for anyone who says otherwise.

Would there be any other kind of Yes Men stunt if there wasn't Youtube video? Even by the standards of the group's anti-consumerism pranks — portraying themselves as spokespeople for McDonalds, Dow Chemical, and organizations such as Housing and Urban Development and the World Trade Organization — this stunt was something of a cerebral sommersault. The idea was to turn the word of authority from these figures on its head and in the process reveal an inconvenient truth.

[A mother smiles for the cameras outside the home of Richard and Mayumi Heene, the parents, who said today they're willing to turn themselves in on charges of staging the Balloon Boy hoax as soon as they're filed; via Getty]

We heard Eric Schmidt was done with girlfriend Kate Bohner around the time he was seen again with his ex Marcy Simon. But a tipster showed us how Schmidt has been funneling some cash in Bohner's general direction.

Yes, right now everyone is pissed off at Richard Heene, the man behind the Balloon Boy hoax, but there are some people whose need for fame has ended in with much worse collateral damage—including death.

• A roundup of restaurants that just opened, or will open soon. [Eater, NYM]
• Sirio Maccioni's Le Cirque celebrated its 35th birthday last night. [NYT]
• Citrine in Chelsea was shut down by the city over the weekend. [Eater]
• Ex-Gourmet editor Ruth Reichl answered a few questions about the mag's demise (and avoided a few others) in yesterday's Times Magazine. But she was a no-show at a party held in Gourmet's honor last night. [NYT, NYDN]
• Have you heard that mac 'n' cheese has staged a comeback? It has! [WSJ]
• Raj Rajaratnam, the hedge fund manager at the center of the biggest insider trading scandal in decades, was an investor in restaurants in his spare time, and supposedly put money into Opia and Rosa Mexicano. [BN]

at a memorial service held today at Lincoln Center for 60 Minutes creator Don Hewitt who died at age 86 in August, according to Broadcasting & Cable.

If you'd marked down October 19 as the day when socialite/publicist Ali Wise would finally appear in court to face charges she allegedly hacked into another socialite's voicemail earlier this year, please note that the prosecutors asked for a little more time to prepare their case today and the judge adjourned it to January 14, 2010. See you then!

McKalip forwarded the "Obama as African witch doctor" email to his tea party friends months ago, and then they made him promise to stop representing them in public.

Obama's willing to look the other way on the medical marijuana thing. You know who is not, though? Lawmen in L.A., which is now one big legal weed spot. They are such bitches.