Mammograms is a word that gets stuck in one's head very easily, and "uproar" about them is the only consistent story today. Dictator kids, drug wars and the chance to win Madoff's polo shirts await!

• The feud between Al Roker and America's most despicable couple continues. After the Today show canceled an interview with Spencer and Heidi Pratt, Spencer took to Twitter to air his rage: "I thought you were out of town getting your stomache [sic] staped [sic] again... Do you always look like your [sic] about to die?" One thing that's clear here: Spencer should have paid more attention in English class. [Us]
• Brat Packer Anthony Michael Hall—who is about to kick off a guest stint on NBC's Community—has been ordered to stay away from his ex, Diana Falzone, a "relationship expert" who writes for the Huffington Post and hosts a show on Sirius. Falzone was granted a restraining order after Hall allegedly broke down her door last week and "bashed her head against a wall." [P6]
• Nicole Richie and Joel Madden secured a restraining order against two paparazzi who Richie says have been harassing her. Is it just us, or are restraining orders becoming all the rage? [TMZ]
• MTV has premiered Beyoncé's new video for "Video Phone" featuring a special guest appearance by Lady Gaga. In a surprising twist, it's Lady Gaga who looks fairly normal and Beyoncé who looks a little freaky. [MTV, NYP]

Going Rogue is out today! The Washington Post have put together a cursory index that includes Hasselbeck, Elizabeth:"bold and talented," and Lieberman, Joe: a "bright spot" in the campaign. They also reveal who Palin calls when naked and soapy.

A Wikipedia user put together a list of the 50 highest grossing movies of the decade; only nine of them are not sequels or adaptations, The Wrap points out. And, at a generous estimate, only five are not terrible.

Last week we reported that mystery playboy Jho Low - the one who flies Megan Fox around and drops hundreds of thousands on champagne - was mixed up with rumored arms dealers. Over the weekend we found out more.

Beyonce and Lady Gaga leak a clip from their forthcoming music video; Levi Johnston disguises himself as the Unabomber; at least one member of Congress thinks Carrie Prejean should run for office. Welcome to Tuesday's gossip.

Looks like Ali Wise really is good at damage control. Despite being charged with four felonies for hacking into her ex's romantic interests' cellphone accounts, Ali has a job, and will host a pop-up store opening on Friday.

Fashion Week Daily reports:

Stepping into the cold air of a moonless night, Bella Swan quivered with anticipation for the Twilight: New Moon premiere. Awaiting the film's arrival at a theater near her, she contented herself with a handsome assortment of Edward Cullen-themed objects.

When I read that this year's Oxford University Press Word of the Year is "unfriend" I began typing a post about interpersonal relations on the Internet. Then I realized that the Word of the Year is a huge scam.

We've all heard that 9/11 mastermind Khalid Shaikh Mohammed will be tried in New York. Would you believe that Rudy Giuliani expressed conflicting opinions about trying terrorists on American soil before and after he learned he would never be president?

Is there anything Neil Patrick Harris can't do? Tonight, the singer/dancer/actor/magician/Internet video sweetheart has proved himself to be a master Twitter-er as well. Quick, somebody invent a new technology that this man can use to entertain us.

When blowhards collide: Tonight on the "O'Reilly Factor", thankfully retired CNN anchor Lou Dobbs announced that he is "thinking about a lot of opportunities"—including running for New Jersey Senate. Also: that Obama is not "the devil" (el Diablo)

When they're not killing dinosaurs or being blown up by Bruce Willis meteors sure are nice-looking. Tonight, the annual Leonid meteor shower reaches its peak, and dozens of meteors per hour should streak across the sky. Here's how to watch:

Sanity is a relative term in the realm of Hollywood directors who generally function on a mental health continuum ranging from borderline OCD cases on the benign end to paranoid schizophrenic megalomaniacs on the deeper end.

[Photographers take pictures of the space shuttle Atlantis as it launches in Cape Canaveral, Fla., today for an 11-day mission. Image via Getty]

There is no wang. We repeat, there is no wang! Playgirl's seen the results of last week's photo shoot, and while there may be glimpses of Levi Johnston's baby maker, there is no full-frontal shot. Let the blame game begin!

Twitter employees have been uploading pictures of their new digs in San Francisco. Looks like the microblogging startup is more concerned with catching up to its rapid growth than with coherent interior decoration.

Maybe this is just a Rohrschach test for whether you're a gay leftist gossip site, but we think the holiday-card treatment on the Ellen Degeneres cover of O makes the word "Joy" look like "Gay." (Or "Goy" if you're Jewish.)

Democrat Bill Owens originally had a 5,000 vote lead over Hoffman. That vote shrank to 3,000. There are 5,800 of absentee votes left to count! And though Hoffman would need to win 75% of those votes, and though presumably many of those votes were cast before Republican Dede Scozzafava withdrew from the race (and endorsed Owens), Hoffman has decided that his concession was premature. Well, Glenn Beck decided that Hoffman's concession was premature. And Hoffman just does whatever Glenn Beck says. Because he is a true conservative.