Two South Korean civilians were found dead on the island of Yeonpyeong today, after North Korea shelled the island.

New York's no bullshit governor-elect Andrew Cuomo is more than just a shrewd politician — he's now one of People magazine's sexiest men alive! How does he maintain his sexiness? "A lot of it's just natural. It's genetic sculpting." Oh.

Have you heard? Wall Street is getting its swagger back! But while this is obviously great news, it's been a long time since finance guys turned their swag on. So we've assembled a guide to help them!

A massive new study appears to show that a daily dosage of common antiretroviral pill called Truvada to HIV-negative patients is 90 percent effective at preventing HIV infection. Terrific news! Too bad no one knows who'll pay for it.

The 29 New Zealand miners missing underground since an explosion last week were declared dead following a second, "massive" explosion.

Remember Alisha Arnold, the female half of the couple behind the abortion-by-vote hoax Birthornot.com? Well, she got a result from her stupid poll! And the result is... She got fired from her job! Couldn't have happened to a nicer person.

By the power vested in me by a website I hereby bring you tonight's Gleecap. Complete with a Nazi hunting Carol Burnett, Sue Sylvester in a wedding dress, and the social event of the suburban Ohio season, the Hummel Wedding!

[The French are so ready for the holidays they've already lit the Christmas lights along the Champs Elysees in Paris. Photo via Getty]

Tonight, Jerry Seinfeld visited the Late Show for a rare stand-up performance. Inside, watch Seinfeld gripe about 5-Hour Energy drinks and how—nowadays—things either suck or are great. Also: Seinfeld and David Letterman discuss his recent White House performance.

UCLA neuroscientist David Jentsch, who conducts research on rodents and primates, received a gruesome package earlier this month: "Bloody, AIDS-tainted razor blades," courtesy "the Justice Department."

America, rejoice! Tonight, during Dancing with the Stars' live finale, Bristol Palin was deservedly, FINALLY given the boot when she finished in third place. Shotgun-fearing televisions across the country may now come out of hiding! Watch Palin get eliminated inside.

Emboldened, one imagines, by the successful internet campaign to have actress Betty White host Saturday Night Live, famous cookie monster Cookie Monster has started his own SNL-hosting campaign with this audition tape, complete with a cookie Lady Gaga.

Police in three different countries have arrested 11 alleged terrorists suspected of planning an attack in Belgium.

The Israeli Army has a new plan for catching draft dodgers who claim to be Orthodox Jews to get out of compulsory military service: Check Facebook and see if they're going out on Friday nights.

Meet Tosha! Tosha is an adorable little kitty cat. In this video, Tosha's owner attempts to wake him up—several times—with little success. Watch as Tosha covers his eyes, meows with exhausted disdain for his owner's interruption, and more.

Comedian Nick Kroll waxes poetic on McDonalds, Star Jones, Unemployment and Seal. What type of fish is in the Filet-O-Fish? Nobody knows. Not even McDonalds employees.

Sadly, being accused of sexual assault doesn't make priests automatic contenders for the title of "Worst Priest in the World." But hiring a hitman to kill your accuser, as Father John Fiala of Texas did? That gets you up there.

[Kim Kardashian helped open the Charmin bathroom in Times Square today, so fat tourists will all have a place to tinkle as they do their Christmas consuming. This is the pinnacle of American kulture. Image via AP]

You don't need to convert to Judaism and wear a yarmulke to cover up your bald spot. You can just spray on some fake hair with HairCubed. If only all infomercials were this entertaining.

The Bobo Brooklyn super couple, she the actress and he the filmmaker, are divorcing. They were married in 2005 and have a baby son, of whom Leigh, who filed the divorce, is seeking full custody. Park Slope weeps tonight.