Like many people, I have often idly wondered which actor from That 70s Show I would most want in my fallout shelter. And at last, I have a definitive answer: Ashton Kutcher. He's studying Muay Thai! He owns guns!

Take a look at these two post-blizzard New York City streets, courtesy Brooklyn blog Sheepshead Bites—one impeccably plowed, the other, well, not so much. Can you guess which one Mayor Mike Bloomberg lives on?

Reese Witherspoon is engaged to her boyfriend, CAA agent Jim Toth, whom she has been dating since January. I know how this ends! He fights the cello teacher and then gets run over. Still, best of luck.

Denis Dutton, the academic and founder of Arts and Letters Daily, has died at 66.

Sean Hannity is on vacation this week, so his Fox News show is being hosted by Tucker Carlson. During a discussion tonight about President Obama's controversial defense of Michael Vick, Carlson said that Vick "should have been executed." Watch inside.

Patti's golden rules were broken tonight, so no successful matches were made. Exotic diva Elena had the best of Swayze tonight-some Ghost and then some Dirty Dancing. Matt on the other hand, had a drink thrown on him.

Alas! A life-size wax figure of Patrick Swayze as his Road House character Dalton ("sports his famous flowing 1980s hair style... shoes not included") has been sold at auction, and you did not win. You will never find happiness now!

According to a new study, couples who wait a month or more after starting to date to have sex tend to have stronger and more stable marriages. Can you guess which university sponsored this study?

Brian Regan is a comic genius who should be a huge star. Why he isn't is a complete mystery. In this clip, he talks about writing a lines for the Planet of the Apes remake and rollercoasters based on movies.

[A crew shovels off the Q train track in Coney Island today. Plenty of New Yorkers are pissed that two days after the snow started their roads haven't been plowed and public transport is a mess. Image via AP]

Hundreds of flights have been canceled, none more important than the one 8 year old Alexander Wright was boarding. Watch him complain to the local news about how he's supposed to be in Florida, tanning.

Here is a compilation of moments in trailers where they mention that the movie is in 3D. For many it's not just 3D, but their very own, special 3D. You may shake your head in disgust.

Is this Bieber kissing Selena Gomez? Tween blog BieberHeiress says yes, and they once leaked photos of Bieber snuggling his ex, so they would know. For Bieber micro-gossip is a young blogger's game, that my brittle old mind barely comprehends.

This compilation features Conan from his Tonight Show days getting a peek into the world of professional stuntmen with guide Stephen Ho. Conan gets pretty worked over.

Today we laughed at roving bands of mean old people terrorizing retirement homes. Ohh, aren't mean elderly folks just so funny? Well, not that funny, said one commenter who brought us all down a bit.

Washington's annual Conservative Political Action Conference is always a major audition for Republican presidential candidates, who show up and tell interest groups whatever they want to hear. But in 2011, will the gays scare everyone away?

The bomb squad was called when a bag exploded today at Miami International Airport and pieces of metal flew out. But it wasn't a bomb, just an exploding can of hairspray. Now we have to worry about militant hairdressers?

TONIGHT: We've got the 33rd Kennedy Center Honors, a rescheduled NFL game and the 16 and Pregnant reunion special and controversial abortion episode. Plus, a new Millionaire Matchmaker and an early bedtime because every late night show is a repeat.

You know how you can't taste food when you're sick? It's the holidays and you've been waiting all year for that Tofurky, but then you eat it and: oh noes. I cannot taste the Tofurky. This chain smoking poet understands.

Downloading something? Some progress bars appear to move quicker than others. How are our minds fooled into thinking so? It's the movement within the bars.