Wondering why you're so stressed? According to Joe Kramer, it could be the lack of anal breathing and massage in your life. Watch as he talks you through some VERY normal and not at all gross exercises.

Imagine: Your very own, handsomely embossed official Barack Obama birth certificate. It could soon be yours!! A bill introduced in the Hawaii state legislature would allow anyone to get a copy of the president's Hawaii birth records for just $100.

Here's a video from a cover band performance of Whitney Houston's "I Wanna Dance with Somebody" at the Winstar Casino. But the true star isn't the singer—it's the elderly couple performing an interpretive dance to the song. Awwwwww!

Dave Chappelle takes the stage at The Laugh Factory, the very same stage where Michael Richards shamed himself, and expresses his feelings on the matter. He claims the truth is, he's really 20% Black, 80% Comedian.

Watch a short video of this dog, who believes she is trapped, attempt to reach her toys that lie just outside of her grasp.

Charlie Sheen apparently had entire briefcase "full of cocaine" delivered to his house before being hospitalized. Look for Sheen to launch a new line of signature "drug luggage" (druggage?)—including the coke briefcase and the painkiller toiletry kit.

Aries Spears is notorious for his LL Cool J, DMX, Snoop Dogg, and Jay-Z impressions. Check out some of his finer verses inside. If you're a hip hop fan, you won't regret it.

[The streets in Brooklyn were clear today for these women to walk their dogs in the road. More pictures of post-snowfall frolicking inside. Image via Getty]

Hello! Tonight, American Idol is back with another always-entertaining audition episode (on FOX, at 8:00 PM ET). So, stop what you're doing, get in front of the television (and your computer, duh), and join us inside for our live-blog!

If you ever found it complicated to tie your own neck tie, then this kinetic sculpture by Seth Goldstein is for you. It took about five years to design and build, and soon it will be in a Philadelphia museum.

Ricky Gervais was nice enough to film this promo for the Live Coco Cam, but ended up hating himself for it. Watch this video of Gervais' attempt to record the piece under poor conditions.

After an appellate court kicked ex-White House chief of staff Rahm Emanuel off the Chicago mayoral ballot for flunking residency requirements, the Illinois Supreme Court tentatively ruled he was actually OK to run. Now it's official: Print up those ballots!

On tomorrow night's Portlandia, Aubrey Plaza (who plays Parks & Recreation's April) will make a visit to the feminist bookstore. It seems that she'll run into the same types of problems that Steve Buscemi did last week.

For all you Jackass fans out there, a Jackass 3.5 will be coming out April 1st, and here is the first official trailer. It's 85 minutes of absurd, disgusting, and hilarious extra footage compressed for a .5 version.

President Obama fielded one of the many questions about drugs during his YouTube interview today! And he didn't laugh it off like last time. While he doesn't support legalization, he acknowledges it's an "entirely legitimate topic for debate." Better!

Today we looked at funny picture of Katie Couric rescuing Barry Diller's Maserati from the terrible snow. "Ha ha, silly rich people," we all said. One commenter said it best.

Boy, we haven't seen such blatant plugging of TV characters since ...ever? Here, Jim Belushi and Jerry O'Connell plug their character's real-life inspiration—two Las Vegas lawyers. Wait a second, isn't CBS the most profitable network in America?

Here's a video of the real stammer-filled speech King George VI gave at the opening of the British Empire Exhibition. It's similar to the speech that begins the Oscar-nominated movie The King's Speech. How faithful was the adaptation?

Debra Schmitt, a recently divorced high school teacher in San Rafael, California, didn't show up for class last Thursday. Students found the message "Thank you everyone" on the blackboard, but no teacher. She hasn't been seen since. Ominous. [AP]

Indiana Rep. Mike Pence, who has an unusually devout following among conservatives, has announced he won't run for president. Thus concludes an afternoon of speculation that began with a call to his mother.