Asking a rapper who once called President Obama "the biggest terrorist" to headline an inauguration party might seem like a recipe for a fiasco.

Tom Foreman is an Emmy Award-winning journalist for CNN who has covered everything from the Sago Mine explosion to the economy to the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. He has also been obsessively writing letters to President Obama for the last four years. Every. Single. Day.

Yesterday was deemed a day to appreciate your guns in America, and boy did we. Five people were shot at gun shows in North Carolina, Ohio and Indiana. These were not, however, the only instances of gun violence yesterday.

Charity is great and all, but oftentimes there's just not enough drinking involved. Thankfully, New Jersey-based Flying Fish Brewery is here to help. Flying Fish has announced a new brew called FU Sandy; all of the proceeds will benefit hurricane relief.

Two adults and three children are dead after being shot by a teenager in an Albuquerque home this morning.

Barbara Walters has been hospitalized after falling on a stair and hitting her head at the British Ambassador's home.

A Manly, Australia library is moving all of Lance Armstrong's books to their fiction section, following his admission that he used performance-enhancing drugs and blood transfusions during his historic run of Tour de France victories.

President Barack Obama was officially sworn in for his second term as president. In a small ceremony at the White House, Obama swore to "preserve, protect, and defend the Constitution of the United States." The oath was administered by Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts; Michelle, Sasha and Malia joined him too.

Hooters — the restaurant you totally go to "just for the wings" — is getting a new look. Its location in Kirby, Texas has just unveiled a new redesign that will serve as a "prototype for future Hooters locations."

Joe Biden was sworn in to his second term this morning. A Corvette delivered the oath, kidding, it was Sonia Sotomayor.

Conservationists are burying perfectly good Scotch in the Antarctic ice to "protect Shackleton's legacy," the monsters.

Three people were wounded Saturday afternoon after an accidental shooting at the Dixie Gun and Knife Show in Raleigh, North Carolina. The incident apparently occurred at a security check point when the owner of a 12-gauge shotgun was asked to remove his gun from its case. Somehow, the gun discharged, shooting two people in the hand and one in the right torso.

It's almost the night before Inauguration Day and no one in the entire city of Washington D.C. has a single thing to wear. The Wall Street Journal provides an investigative report:

Poor Justin Bieber. When he's not the subject of a murder/castration plot or, worse, being mocked by James Franco, he's getting embarrassed by his mom, Pattie Mallette, who executive produced a pro-life film coming out soon. The movie, called Crescendo, will be screened at "pregnancy centers" around the country with the goal of raising $10 million. And, if you attend one of the screenings, you might just get lucky and see Mama Bieber herself; Mallette will appear at "some of these" screenings, according to Movie to Movement, the ridiculously named company that produced the film.

Congratulations, Toronto Star columnist Rosie DiManno – not only have you written a horrifying story about a horrible incident, but you have also written what's probably the worst lede of all time. That lede is:

Saturday, a gunman attempted to shoot a Bulgarian politician during a televised news conference. The video is wild. In it, Ahmed Dogan, the leader of Bulgaria's Movement for Rights and Freedoms – Bulgaria's Turkish party, narrowly escapes getting shot in the head after a gunman runs on stage during a speech and attempts to fire two shots. The gun apparently jammed, giving Dogan time to knock it from the attacker's hands before security stepped in. The gunman, identified as a 25-year-old from the Bulgarian town of Burgas, near the Black Sea, continues to fight, despite being pinned down and having the shit kicked out of him by various security guards and on-lookers. Police also found two knives on the attacker after he was detained.

Surveillance footage capturing a homeless man's death in the alley behind a CVS pharmacy in Chicago in 2010 was released today, showing several minutes of the attack in which store manager Pedro Villarosa held down and strangled 35-year-old Anthony Kyser while six passersby helped hold him down.

Why can't you suits understand: Kim Dotcom is just a simple man with a simple website who's definitely not burning with rage at the government officials who raided his mansion and arrested him almost exactly a year ago today?

A man in Detroit was arrested Friday after he allegedly stole his father's body from a cemetery. According to reports, Vincent Bright corpsenapped his father's body from a cemetery on Monday, hours before it was to be buried, in the hopes it would be resurrected through prayer. Police found the body in a basement freezer in Bright's home.

As a general rule, I hate movie scenes that take place in the rain. Not necessarily because of the rain itself, but because whenever you see rain you know someone is sad, or in love, or sadly in love, or dying. I believe in the human capacity for imagination, and that we haven't come up with a better device to show melancholy or romance than some storm clouds and a light drizzle, kinda pisses me off.