Eli Lake, one of the surviving workers still huddled in the ruins of Newsweek and the Daily Beast, celebrates May Day by gloating about the glories of capitalism.

DreamWorks Animation just purchased AwesomenessTV, the pop culture YouTube network that channels the soul of fourteen year olds and is curated in neon. This is the first time a major media company has purchased a YouTube network.

A 16-year-old student called a "good kid" by her principal will be tried as an adult on two felony charges after conducting what her classmates called "a science project gone bad."

R&B diva/proud songwriter/walking Lisa Frank sticker book Mariah Carey renews her vows to her husband Nick Cannon every year. I put it that way because it is clear that Mariah is pulling the strings in this relationship, including the one attached to Nick's back that delivers compliments on demand, like he's a custom-made Talking Pee-Wee Herman Doll: "You're #beautiful, just like the title of your upcoming stone groove smash hit wonder with Miguel, Mariah!" "You are the biggest selling female recording artist of all time, Mariah!" "Pee on me!" You know, things of that nature.

Last night was the PEN gala, when our nation's leading literary lights like emcee Willie Geist and featured co-host Andrew Ross Sorkin gathered beneath a giant fake blue whale in the Museum of Natural History and all Twittered at each other because they had one of those big Twitter screens that everyone puts up at big events these days to leverage high-impact engagement of #socialmedia #wins. Philip Roth didn't Twitter at #pengala as far as I know, but he did brag about how many Czech girls he fucked.

Despite the fact that it's been the law of the land for more than three years now, the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act, ratified by President Obama in 2010, is still a mystery to many. So much so that a new poll from the Kaiser Family Foundation finds that four out of 10 Americans have no idea it's still a law at all:

A public school in Flushing, Queens, has officially been recognized by New York City officials as being the first public school in the nation to offer its students an all-vegetarian menu.

Three additional suspects were arrested in the Boston Marathon bombing case today: Two Kazah students at UMass Dartmouth, charged with obstruction of justice for removing or destroying items from bombing suspect Dzhokhar Tsarnaev's dorm room, and an American citizen, charged with lying to investigators.

Sundance has renewed Rectify for a second season, which means we'll get to stare into Daniel Holden's dreamy/complicated manchild eyes for at least 10 more episodes next year.

Thomas Friedman manages decent structural analysis ("We now live in a 401(k) world—a world of defined contributions, not defined benefits") in his column today, smuggled in alongside Friedmanism ("where everyone needs to pass the bar exam and no one can escape the most e-mailed list"). We salute you, fellow traveler!

In recent weeks, General Electric and Comcast have both ceased doing business with companies in the gun trade. One media outlet thinks it knows why: Unable to get gun control from Congress, the Fortune 500 firms are working with their favorite socialist president to eliminate America's free market in guns.

A real estate company in New York is giving each of its 800 employees a permanent 15% raise for no additional work. All it's asking for in return is that the employees tattoo the company's logo somewhere on their bodies.

Sometimes you see a dated movie about old-school technology, and you're like: "Oh, haha, people were so easily impressed." This short film totally looks like that, but it's actually the opposite of that.*

Barry West, a commissioner for Coffee County, Tennessee, apparently thinks there's only one appropriate way to wink at a Muslim, and it involves a double-barreled shotgun. He posted the above image to his Facebook timeline...where Muslim activists found it. And West's home phone number.

What a card: Kevin Spacey was out jogging on Monday in Boston when he spotted a woman having her picture taken and decided to make a surprise cameo appearance.

Sohel Rana, the politically "untouchable" Bangladeshi political boss, businessman, and alleged drug runner, has finally been touched. All it took was 400 deaths. Rana, the owner (and namesake) of the building whose horrific collapse injured thousands and killed over 400 people last week, was arrested earlier this week, and throughout Wednesday, May Day protesters were calling for his execution.

For at least the third time this month, a young child has shot and killed someone. On Tuesday afternoon, a five-year-old boy fatally shot his two-year-old sister in Cumberland County, Kentucky with .22 rifle the five-year-old was given as a gift.

The seven Americans killed in Monday's plane crash in Afghanistan (horrifying video of which was captured on a dashboard camera) have been identified. Officials are still investigating the crash, but NATO has denied the Taliban's claims of responsibility.

We all know Taco Bell can be bad for you (though they're reportedly working on that) but this is excessive: a high school in Sacramento, California went into lockdown after a “suspicious object” turned out to be a Taco Bell bag.

The FDA approved the sale of the morning-after pill without a prescription, but only to women aged 15 and older. The move comes three weeks after a federal judge ruled the FDA must make the pill available over-the-counter for all ages.