Is this real life? Here I am in New York “Fuckin” City, the roughest as well as toughest city that never sleeps—not even for a minute. Well maybe all of that insomnia is getting to us because—what’s this?—Swedish tourists are the “tough guys” here now?

Things have changed around here, I guess? Is this what’s happening now? Because normally I would have thought New York “Fuckin” City was so hardcore that if we see some tourists from Sweden, we’d all just be like, “come on.” We’d be like, “Sweden? Okay. Have fun. Seriously. Come on guys.”

“Here’s the people in charge here, in New York City—a bunch of Swedish tourists. They’re the boss now.” Can you imagine?

I suppose we all better start imagining because I’m going to tell you the truth: you can’t dispute the true facts. It’s all here in the news. BOOM—there was a fight on the subway (no big deals for a “real” New Yorker am I right) and BOOM—guess who broke up the fight? Take a guess. Take three to five guesses. I bet you didn’t guess “some Swedish tourists, if you can believe that,” but brother, that’s exactly what happened.

And on top of that they were cops (in Sweden) “headed to see Les Miserables”!! Here is the new boss of New York City, I guess?

“One of the guys tried to wrestle us so [we] wrestled him to the floor until the police came,” Samuel Kvarzell, 25, another one of the Swedish officers said. “They were screaming.”

“We don’t have [any] authority or anything but we thought somebody might need help,” he said.

So it seems we must confront the unavoidable fact that four police men from the land of Sweden with no authority or anything who were headed uptown to see Les Miserables are, in fact, the toughest guys here now.

Get it together New York City. Seriously.

[Photo: you look up “Swedish guys” on Flickr and this is the photo that comes up, and if you think I’m just trying to make New York City seem “soft” for bowing down to these guys, you can look at this photo of the actual guys in the news story, then look back at the photo above, and I think you’ll agree it is a very fair representation of “Swedish guys” (the new badasses around the Big Apple, or so evidence would indicate).]