So-called "Human Barbie" Valeria Lukyanova (not to be confused with this Human Barbie or this one or this one or any of the others or Human Ken) claims she was attacked on Halloween by strangers outside her apartment in Odessa, Ukraine.

The Daily Mail shares this gem of a human's harrowing account:

I was attacked by the entrance of my block of flats.

I came back home from a shop with bags and entered the door code when two men rushed from the dark and attacked me.

They said nothing and did not try to rob me.

It happened in a flash, they hit me on the head, several times on my jaw, then one of them began strangling me.

If it wasn't for my neighbor who who suddenly appeared, I don't know what would have happened. They saw her and ran away.

I feel a little better, but my jaw is still hurting badly.

I have been on the strongest pain killer for four days, but still woke in the middle of the night from horrible pains.

Lukyanova says she's been receiving threats for the past two years, since her whole...thing came to prominence. Unrelated or whatever: Lukyanova claims that her face is natural and her breasts are the only part of her body that have been surgically altered.

The Daily Mail has pictures of Lukyanova of in bandages that are in no way related to plastic surgery. (Her lip really does look super fucked up.)

[ Image via Instagram]