Whilst lesser news sites of the world are nattering on about the “World’s Ugliest Dog,” here is the real news: NASA has literally (Literally? Literally.) discovered a Mysterious Alien Pyramid in Space. If you don’t think that’s big news, fuck off.

IT SEEMS that our space agency has, while no one was paying attention, dispatched a spacecraft to photograph the faraway dwarf planet Ceres—located so far out in space that it does not appear on any Google map. So what, big deal, what did they find out there, anyhow, some kind of mysterious space evidence of mystery?

That’s exactly what they fuckin found! From the LA Times:

Dawn has discovered another surprising feature on the surface: a roughly three-mile-high mountain that juts out of the ground alone.

“We do not know yet what make this peak on Ceres, let alone made it the observed shape,” Russell said. “This is another total surprise to the team. However, there are processes on Earth that can grow mounds out of ground water in Arctic terrains on Earth. But these are much smaller structures.

NASA also photographed, and I quote, “bright spots” on Ceres. Okay— do you think there’s electricity there? There’s not—or so they say.

Unexplained space pyramids? Blazing bright spots? On top of that, a crank emailed us today to say that he spotted a UFO in Atlanta. Related?

We will find out—or we will burn NASA to the ground... for the truth (which is out there).

[Photo: AP]